Author: Perspective Confessions

How to Win with Your Money

Do you have a financial or money goal for 2025? Pay off a credit card? Save for a vacation? Save for a car? Save for a medical procedure? Something else? Do you wonder why your money disappears so quickly? Do you have more month than money? It’s disheartening to work so hard for our paychecks and feel like there’s never enough money. Did you know in the 1970’s people were exposed to 500-1,600 marketing ads per day? Today, the average is estimated between 6,000-10,000 marketing ads per day. We see more than 12x more ads each day than we did 50 years ago. 🤯 That’s one indicator of why we can’t keep our money for very long and why we lose track of it. The reality is every ad you see is vying for your hard-earned dollar. Marketers are smart and they want to separate you from your money. They know how to play into your emotions and how to make you think and feel like you can’t live without a product or service. Not to mention all the data our phones collect about what we click on, how many seconds we watch or stop scrolling to see an ad. With this data, marketers can put even more pinpointed products and services in front of you in the form of ads. What do we do about it?

    1. Game Plan and Defensive Strategy

        When you play a game, the goal is to win. Think of this as money goals = winning. Next, to win, you need a solid defense strategy. In its basic meaning, defense means having a defender for every gap. Where are your money gaps? How do you know what they are? Once you know, you can enable your defenders.

        2. Money Plan vs Actual Spending

        The best tool to identify where your money gaps are is going to be…wait for it…a budget. Yes, I know! The horrible “B” word. 😉 If it feels better for you, refer to it as your money plan instead! You’re going to take a little time, set out a money plan for the month and then track what you actually spend. Then compare what your plan was versus your actual spending. This exercise will identify your gaps. Where are you overspending? Do you have enough income to cover your basics expenses?

        3. Mind your Gaps

        Once you know where you are overspending, then you can enable your defenders. Are you shopping too much? Defense: consider deleting your shopping apps or unsubscribing to email lists. Take away the temptation. Are you spending a lot of money on fast food? Defense: consider making sandwiches at home to take for lunch. Are you finding that you aren’t able to cover your basic expenses: housing, food, clothes, transportation? Defense: What are ways you could make more money either by side hustle or finding a job that will pay more?

        It’s great to have money goals. That’s step one, establish your goal because that’s how you’ll know if you are winning. Money goal = winning. How are you going to move forward toward accomplishing your money goal? Define your game plan, identify your gaps and enable your defenders to fill in the gaps. You’ve worked hard for your money and you should keep it or at least tell it where to go instead of wondering where it went.

        Intentionally Aware

        Our modern world 🌎 is so fast paced. The expectations are right here, right now, and on demand. Today’s modern life depicts that we can have anything and everything at the touch of a button 🔘. Consider Netflix with endless streaming options; or Amazon with a conveyor belt of products to your front door 🚪 with what your heart desires. Consider DoorDash making food options seem endless and easy. What’s wrong with having options at the touch of a button? On the surface, there’s nothing wrong with it. However, there’s a better question to ask instead: What are we missing?

        How much time ⏱️ do you spend deciding what to watch on your streaming service? So. Many. Options. Anxiety creeps in about picking the wrong show or movie to watch because there might be something better if I just keep looking 👀. How much time do you spend binge watching a series? Has that box popped up on the screen asking “Are you still watching?” because the same show is still playing after watching 3 episodes. What are we missing?

        Time. ⌛️

        Time scrolling through too many options. Hours spent watching episode after episode. What else could you do with that time? Read a book, learn a new skill, study for a class, practice a hobby, pray, hang out with a friend or your spouse, volunteer. Are we intentionally making the decision of how we want to spend our time? Or are we allowing our time to slip away? ⌛️

        What about shopping online with a business like Amazon? What are we missing?

        Delayed gratification. Money. Social interactions.

        Amazon is like a genie in a bottle. Make a wish for a product and it arrives lickity split except for that whole exchange of money 💵 thing. 2️⃣0️⃣ years ago, if I wanted a new shirt, I would have to plan when I would drive to the nearest mall. The next thought would be checking to see if there was a sale happening soon so my hard-earned money 💵 stretched further. I might have planned to go with a friend to make it a more enjoyable experience. 2️⃣0️⃣ years ago, I would intentionally plan when I would shop, how I would spend my money, and who I would bring along with me. All the planning and thought also meant I was delaying my gratification of getting a shirt right away. We say “no” to our children because it’s not healthy to have a piece of candy anytime they want it. Are we saying “n”o to ourselves often enough to ensure we have a healthy delayed gratification muscle? 💪

        What about a service like DoorDash? What are we missing?

        Cooking skills. Health. Money. Family heritage.

        Beyond the excessive expense of the service, fast and processed food 🍕has eroded our health. Our bodies need nutrient dense foods 🥗. If we cooked more often at home, we would have better control of the ingredients we are putting in our bodies to nourish them well. Developing cooking skills are being limited by allowing restaurants to do it instead. Cooking is a major life and survival skill. There’s no need to be a Chef, however, everyone needs to know their way around a kitchen, how to plan a meal, and know where ingredients are in the grocery 🛒 store. What about your grandmother’s recipes 📝, something your mom or aunt always made? Is it possible that family heritage is slipping away without the knowledge, practice, and cooking skills to keep them going? Regardless, you are paying a hefty price 💲 for convenience.

        Don’t get me wrong. I have a Netflix subscription, an Amazon Prime account, and I have DoorDashed on a rare occasion. These options aren’t wrong, however, it is VERY easy to slip into living your life on auto pilot. The endless scrolling, buying, and eating out because it’s easy. There’s a price 💲 to pay for convenience. There’s always a price!

        One very valid argument is our busy, hectic schedules demand that we continue moving at lightening ⚡️ speed. I agree, our schedules aren’t slowing down and I would suggest using these options as measured 📏 conveniences. Measure them by being intentionally aware. Be intentional when you need to use them. Be intentional in the money 💵 you spend on convenience. Be intentional in what you are trading for your time ⌛️. Be intentional of how your decisions are impacting your health 🩺. Don’t lose yourself in the haze of busy and put your brain 🧠 on autopilot. Live the life you have to the fullest and intentionally choose what works best for you. Let’s be aware of what modern conveniences provide, how they can make our lives easier, and let’s also consider what we are missing or giving up by using them. Be intentionally intentional with your time ⌛️, money 💵, and health 🩺.

        Mississippi Girl

        Small Town Girl in the Big City

        Article originally published in Tish Co News, linked here.

        “You can take the girl out of the small town, but you can’t take the small town out of the girl.” True story when it comes to this small town girl. I moved away from Iuka, Mississippi in 2002 to go to school at Mississippi State University and had no idea that it was a foreshadowing of a much bigger move in 2006 to the big city of Houston, Texas. Moving to such a big city was a culture shock and even though I’ve lived in Houston for 19 years now, my heart still yearns for the slower pace of the small town life.

        Work brought me to Houston all those years ago. Anytime I run across someone in Texas with Mississippi roots or someone comments on my southern twang, I light up to talk about where I was born and raised. Mississippi is at my heart, a part of who I am at my core. Texans who have travelled through Mississippi have commented to me that “the trees are so tall in Mississippi”. I never noticed the contrast in tree heights until said co-workers marveled at the difference from Texas to Mississippi. And I hurriedly chime in to tell them the other differences between these two places. 

        Any car you pass in my small hometown, the driver waves acknowledgment as you drive past. Concrete stretches for eternity in Houston, but back home in the ‘Sip, rolling hills, green pastures dotted with cows and horses, rows of soybeans, corn, and other crops are the eternity stretcher. Somehow words lengthen and shorten all at once with a southern twang accent, which only highlights the character of this place. Mississippi is always depicted as hot and humid in movies where the characters glisten with sweat. That isn’t wrong necessarily, but hello we have air conditioning! In Houston, neighbors live 5 feet away from your front door, but in the ‘Sip there might be a field between neighbors.

        I travel back to Iuka 1-2 times a year to visit my family. I find that it takes me a few days to downshift from the fast pace of corporate America and city life. Every time I come home, I always leave with a greater appreciation. That’s the blessing of coming home, seeing the differing perspectives of where I currently live and contrasting it with my hometown. It’s not only about who is around the table with you sharing a meal, but the hands that made the homemade dishes. Who made the jelly or jam or canned vegetables and it’s all different names. It’s a community nourishing each other’s tables and families. Iuka and small towns like it have a sense of community that isn’t found easily in the big city. In fact, I would say that Houston might be one of the hardest cities to find community. Everyone is so spread out and traffic makes it challenging to get across town to a friend’s home. A 30 minute drive in Houston doesn’t equal 30 miles…more like 30 minutes equals 10 miles on a good day. And when I go to the grocery store in Houston, I never see anyone I know…which is sometimes a good thing, because I don’t have to worry about makeup, or fixing my hair or care what I’m wearing. It’s far from the truth in Iuka where you shop with all your friends and it’s a rare occurrence to not run into someone you know.

        Mississippi will never be just a place on a map to me. It will always mean home. Mississippi built me. I once was on a phone call with a Midland, Texas based co-worker. During the conversation I mentioned I was from Mississippi and said, “like many southern women, I am thoughtful, sweet and hospitable, however, there’s a flip side of being a southern woman who can also be assertive when need be”. I think I scared the man on the other end of the phone call because he asked, “should I be concerned?” I laughed and told him, “no, sir, not at the moment.”

        All kidding and jokes aside, one of my greatest strengths in my career is the ability to not only work with many types and levels of people, but to really connect with them. If I trace this strength back to where it comes from, it would be what I learned growing up in my small hometown. Authenticity, humility, grace, manners, shaking hands and looking people in the eyes when speaking are uncommon these days. But I know a place where it still stands true and that place is my home town, Iuka, Mississippi. I might live 12 driving hours away, but my heart never left…it’s right where it belongs. The small town will always be in this girl.

        Coach Carlynn

        Coaching started for me when I became a fitness 💪 instructor in my late 20’s. I fell in love with fitness classes, and one of the fitness instructors I fangirled over encouraged me to get certified to teach 👩🏻‍🏫.

        So, I did.

        I LOVED ♥️ every minute of teaching, coaching, encouraging others to push past their limits, and achieve their goals 🎯. There’s something addicting about watching someone have a “light bulb💡 moment”. A moment they completed an exercise, lifted heavier weights, completed an entire class, lost the weight, got stronger, etc. All things they had told themselves they could not do.

        And then…they did. I got to witness this over and over and it never got old!

        Fast forward to the year 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣, the start of the pandemic. I wasn’t instructing fitness classes anymore. Instead, I found myself working from home full time. As with many industries and corporations, 2020 was a challenging year. The oil and gas industry was no different and my corporation went through a major headcount reduction starting with executive level all the way down to hourly employees. So much was out of my control with the uncertainty of my job and with the virus. To help pass the time ⏰ and focus on something that was in my control, I completed Financial Coach Master Training, earned my certificate 📜, and became a Financial Coach.

        Many may not know that I’m a nerd 🤓 when it comes to money 💵 . My undergrad degree from Mississippi State University is in Finance so you’d think that’s when the nerd came out, but it wasn’t. I’ve always been into saving money, even from my youth. It wasn’t odd for me to put on a jacket and find money in it. Money that someone gave me and I put in a pocket to save for later.

        In my Junior year of college I read the Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. After reading his book 📕, I would occasionally listen to his radio 📻 talk show. It made sense. I loved that there were baby steps and I could understand it. Now, mind you, I did not follow the baby steps to a “T”. When I graduated college, I had student loans, a credit card, and a car 🚘 note.

        Fast forward through a lot of life and getting remarried in my mid 30’s. We found ourselves in debt. Between tax debt, car 🚘 loan, and student loans; we owed just shy of $30,000. We followed the baby steps and got out of debt within a year’s time. Now we continue to work to pay off our house early and are aggressively saving for retirement. With the 1️⃣1️⃣ year age difference between my husband and me, I hope to retire when he does. That cuts off about 10 years of retirement contributions and savings for me, so it’s hustle time! 👊🏼 #goals

        In 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣3️⃣, I became a Leadership Coach in my corporate oil and gas job. I work one-on-one with leaders with direct reports and influential leaders. Influential leaders are ones that may not have a team reporting to them, but they have many people that they must influence to deliver results and progress projects. In reality, we are all influential leaders in our jobs. During coaching sessions I help clients develop goals that we will work on together. During sessions, we talk through challenges, progress, tools 🛠️ , and potentially even new or refreshed goals. My role as a leadership coach is not to solve the problem for my clients, rather to ask ❓ the right questions , give feedback, reframe, and offer perspective that helps the client find their solution.

        Anyone starting to see 👀 a theme here?

        Coaching.

        Regardless if it’s fitness 💪 coaching, leadership coaching, or financial 💵coaching similar skills apply. I’ve always had in inner coach within me. Especially if you’ve read my writings very much, you’ll see 👀 or read 📖 it. I’m frequently asking questions, encouraging improvement and progress, etc. What goals do you have? What are you willing to do differently to achieve them? Who is holding you accountable? What’s holding you back? What is your plan to achieve your goals?

        Coaching is all about finding the answers to those questions, creating a plan to execute, and having accountability along the way.

        Stay tuned, I’ll have an opening for financial coaching soon! Details to come!

        New Year Perspective

        Happy New Year! A clean slate, a turning of the page, a new chapter, a new book. For some, 2024 may have been unusually difficult and you might be looking forward to the start of a new year. For me, I’m always a little concerned when midnight strikes on December 31. I’m worried about the unknowns and what hardships are in store. Will there be happiness, sadness, excitement? What losses might I experience? My logical brain knows that all of these will be true. My heart, on the other hand, is worried about the possibilities that will be hard and disappointing.

        The truth is every year has challenges, losses, excitement, fun, sadness, happiness, and every other shade of emotion. In God’s wisdom, He did not give us a crystal ball to know what’s coming, instead time unfolds one day unto the next. Deuteronomy 31:8 says “The Lord himself goes before you and will be with you; he will never leave you nor forsake you. Do not be afraid; do not be discouraged.” It’s a comforting reminder that He walks with us daily. We will walk through hardships one step at a time much like any challenge we’ve already walked through, and we are never alone.

        As we begin 2025 with goals, aspirations, or have hope of what this year will bring, I want to share a story I heard many years ago. It’s a story that stepped on my toes and caused me to reflect on the differences of what I’m looking for, what I may find, and the disconnect between the two.

        Here’s the story: A farmer was tending his crops and a man came walking along the road. The man stopped and asked the farmer, “What kind of people are in the next town?” The farmer replied, “what kind of people were in the town that you came from?”

        The man replied, “they were nice and kind people.” The farmer said, “you will find the same type of people in the next town.” And the man departed on his way.

        Some time passed and the same farmer was tending his crops and another man was walking along the road and approached the farmer. He told the farmer he was travelling into the next town and he asked, “what kind of people reside there?”

        The farmer asked, “what kind of people were in the town that you came from?”

        The man replied, “oh, the people in the previous town were unkind, unfair, and judgmental which is why I left.” The farmer stated, “you will find the same type of people in the next town.”

        What does this story illustrate? If you’ve experienced similar challenges and frustrations year after year, it might be an opportunity to reflect on what you are looking for and expecting to find. If you are anticipating hardship in 2025, you will find it. If you are suspecting that 2025 will be challenging, you will find it. Scientifically, our brains are wired to look for the evidence of what we believe. What do you honestly believe about this new year at your core?

        What I know to be true is that I cannot bring the same thought processes and habits if I want something different. I can’t expect to grow friendships if I don’t plan and invest time into those relationships. I can’t expect to become healthier if I don’t plan how and when I’m going to be physically active and eat healthful foods. I’m setting myself up for frustration if nothing changes. It’s, then, easy to assume that it must be the outside world that’s not working. If I take a few steps back and zoom out, I can see the common denominator in frustrations that have seemly repeated in my life is me. If I want change, I need to shift my approach.

        If you are frustrated that 2024 didn’t go so well, take a look at the things that you might be able to change in 2025, like your attitude and what do you honestly believe. What are you expecting to find in 2025? If it’s negative, then it might be time to reflect on how you can shift to more positive expectations. If you have goals you want to accomplish, make sure you aren’t standing in your own way to complete them. You, ultimately, hold the answers. Start with being honest with yourself and decide if it might be time to make a shift.

        You can positively affect the direction of your 2025. You can accomplish your goals with the right mindset. Are you ready to crush 2025 and have an awesome year? Ready, set…let’s GO!

        8 Ways to Have an Affordable Holiday Season

        Find this article also published in the Tishomingo County News.

        Is it just me or has life become expensive? Recently on a grocery trip, I spent $55.40 for only 10 items, the majority of which were vegetables! What in the world?! When prices continue to rise and our paychecks aren’t keeping up, something must give. Ready or not, now the holidays are upon us. Maybe you don’t have money to spend on presents this year. That’s ok. Let’s explore ways we can keep costs down this holiday season.

        First, if you need to scale back gift giving, let your friends and family know. Be upfront, be honest. Even if it feels vulnerable, do it anyway. Who knows, it might bring a sigh of relief to your friends and family because they are feeling the pinch too. See…your bravery in being honest has already been a gift for your friends and family!

        Let’s focus on what we can do instead of what we cannot do, shall we?

        1.     Name drawing – everyone’s name goes into a bowl, and you draw one person in which to purchase a gift. Ground rules would need to be set, such as max dollar amount for the gift. Make sure the ground rule maker knows what your budget is to help manage expectations.

        2.     Potluck meals – if you are normally the host or hostess of a holiday meal, ask your guests to bring drinks, sides, desserts, appetizers, etc. This might add extra effort in organizing to cover all the bases of the meal, but organizing is FREE and the payoff is you aren’t incurring the full expense of the meal.

        3.     Handwritten letters – when was the last time you received a handwritten letter? When was the last time you wrote one? Texting, emails, and posts on social media are what is considered communication these days. What if you wrote a letter to your son or daughter telling them how you’ve witnessed them grow this year? What if you wrote your mom or dad a letter reminiscing about memories and how you think of them? Handwritten letters are priceless! It means that you took time out of your busy schedule and thought of them.

        4.     Draw/Art – do you like to doodle or have an artistic knack? Do you have access to pencils, crayons, colored pencils, markers, paint, etc.? Why not draw your friend or family member a picture? Before you dismiss this idea, it is like handwritten letters in that you took time and drew from your talents for someone special in your life. While growing up in Iuka, there was an elderly lady that was a member of the Iuka Church of Christ. I believe her name was Lenile Archer. Every birthday I received a postcard from her. On one side was a written happy birthday message and on the other side was beautiful art that she had drawn. Even as a young child, I knew how special it was to receive one of her works of art.

        5.     Gift certificates – not the ones that you are thinking. These gift certificates will not cost money. Who on your Christmas list is a new parent? Could you offer babysitting services to give mom or mom and dad some time for errands or a date night? Do you have a skill that someone could benefit? Do you know how to fix mechanical issues on a car? Do you know how to do simple home repairs? Know how to wash a car? Your gift certificate would be for your time and skill to help your loved one.

        6.     Experiences – do you know how to make a great cup of coffee? What about a signature meal or dessert? Is there someone in your life that you’d like to spend more time or catch-up with? Your great cup of coffee or dinner or dessert would be a setup for quality time with your friend or family member. Invite them over or bring your goodies to them to have great conversation and reconnect.

        7.     Photos – when was the last time you printed a photo? How many are on your phone? Who on your Christmas list would love to have the special moment you captured on camera either from years ago or recently? Dollar Tree has inexpensive frames last time I checked.

        8.     Volunteer together – as we feel like our dollars aren’t going as far as they used to, one of the best ways to move our minds off our present circumstances is to help others. There are many ways to serve our communities. Look to your local churches to serve a family in need. Look to your local animal shelters to donate your time. Visit your local nursing home to sit with someone that may not have loved ones close by anymore.

        Money is a resource. Time is also a resource. Sometimes there is more and sometimes less. Look for the blessings regardless. Less money requires creativity. Think outside the gift box. You might be surprised when you don’t miss the number of presents under the tree. The time and experiences that you’ve created instead of buying them will be tucked away in your memories for far longer than the latest gadget fad. All of us have limited time with our loved ones. Many of the suggestions listed are based upon time. Time is an investment. Is fighting crowds to find a gift how you’d like to spend it? Or endless time online shopping? We only have so much face-to-face time with the people on our Christmas lists that we won’t get back. Choose and spend your scarce resources wisely.

        Mental Health Awareness – Therapy

        Therapy

        May is Mental Health Awareness month. This post will come with discomfort, however, I believe it is for the greater good and thus I want to lean into the discomfort and share my journey with therapy.

        The journey with therapy started for me in college. A visit here and there to the on-campus college therapist was grounding for me. At the time, my mom had cancer and being away from home for this first time was hard. I had tough life questions and the therapist on campus helped me zoom out and then zoom in to the questions and thus have a more balanced decision. How many times are we so focused on a question or situation that we can’t zoom out from it to gain a better perspective? For me, it’s often. 😊 A therapist can help with that!

        The larger part to my therapy journey is my mom. She was sick much of my childhood. I was one of her caretakers while growing up and her primary caretaker from the ages of 15 – 18 (until I went off to college). Needless to say, I grew up fast! I was nominated as “Most Dependable” my senior year of high school. While it was an honor to receive that nomination, it was earned in my private home life because I’d learned the ultimate dependability by being my mom’s caretaker.

        There are a lot of positives that come from learning responsibility at a young age and it can also be very confusing. Caretaking an adult is hard for an adult let alone a child doing so. At the age of 25, my mom passed away. She was 55. I don’t think anyone is prepared to lose a parent. Losing my mom unearthed some “life stuff” I needed to address. I sought out therapy to talk through my mom’s death. There was a lot of processing I needed to do. Sometimes we are so close to a situation that we can’t see the full picture. A therapist can help with that.

        I have learned through therapy that my mother’s sickness shaped me, both good and bad. The good is easier to hold some days than the bad. It’s easy to become fixated on one or the other. The point of therapy is to help you hold all aspects about yourself and if at first you can’t hold it by yourself, your therapist is there to hold it until you are able to do so on your own. This is where advocacy comes into play for me and why diversity and inclusion mean so much at my core. My therapist has been my advocate in so many ways. Giving words to situations when I had none. She gave me a voice when I didn’t have one. And she has been there to hold my hand in all the hard things that I’ve been through. I can honestly say I would not be here right now if it weren’t for the gift of therapy. It has been lifechanging. I have learned lifechanging skills in therapy from navigating difficult family relationships, to work challenges, to having compassion for myself. And having compassion for yourself is key to having compassion for others. Looking in the mirror, in my opinion, can be the biggest adversary you face. I know it has been for me. I can certainly stand in my own way. Therapy can help you get out of your own way!

        Therapy is hard, not going to lie. I don’t always like my therapist, lol. But therapy has given me a centeredness, a truth, a groundedness that is priceless. Maybe I would have gotten to this place on my own, but even if I had, it would taken me so much longer. And don’t we deserve to get to a better place as fast as we can?

        A wise friend told me once that “our work on ourselves is a lifetime and one day”, meaning we are always inching toward being better versions of ourselves. I also came across another quote that resonated with me greatly, “the more we can understand our own thoughts, feelings and emotions; the more we can understand someone else’s”. This.Is.So.True. The better you can see yourself, the better you can see others. There’s certainly more I could write about, but I will pause here. I hope this helps you seek a therapist if you’ve been thinking about it. And if you’ve never thought about it, I hope this helps you see a different side to therapy. I think we could all use a good therapist in our lives. Life is hard enough and we deserve to be better people, for ourselves and each other.

        From Dish Gloves to Life Lessons

        Several weeks ago, I found myself rummaging under the kitchen sink for dish gloves. A few dishes wouldn’t fit in the dishwasher and needed to be washed by hand. My skin had begun to burn under the scalding water, thus my rummaging to find something to save my skin! Score, found them! I hadn’t used these dish gloves in quite some time; they had become a forgotten item under the sink. What I thought would be a simple task of washing a few dishes instead became a flood of memories. Memories that made me smile and my heart hurt a little bit for the time that has passed. Have you encountered that before? An item stirring up a walk down memory lane.

        I remembered where dish gloves were used everyday…that would be at my grandmother’s house, Grannie Bea. She has no dishwasher, only her hands. What I also remembered was it wasn’t just her hands that washed dishes, my grandfather often put on those bright yellow dish gloves and cleaned up the kitchen too. I remember him telling Grannie Bea, “you cooked, I’ll clean up”. They had a true partnership. She worked alongside him at their gas station/general store they owned and he helped with chores around the house. I’d never thought much about this model in marriage or partnership before, but now that I’m older and I consider their generation, it’s probably not so normal that my grandfather chipped in around the house with chores. It was probably not so normal that my grandmother worked outside the home. And then I thought about the example they set for my mom and my aunt and also for my sister and me.

        I can remember putting on those bright yellow dish gloves when I was old enough and took a turn at washing dishes after a wonderful meal had been prepared by my grandmother. Who knew valuable life lessons could be taught by such a simple item such as dish gloves? We all play a part in our families. In order to thrive and function well means we take turns, pick up the slack or let another family member or friend chip in so it can all get done.

        How do you tag team with your family to get all the things done in your home?

        How To Make Vegetable Broth At Home

        If you cook often or even just every once in a while, you’ll find that you wind up throwing away the ends and pieces of vegetables as you chop them for dinner. Composting is one way to use these ends and pieces and saving them for vegetable broth is another. In this video is a step by step guide to making your own vegetable broth. I find this is a way to maximize those ends and pieces of left over veggies, clean out your fridge and maximize the nutrients from veggies. I have few tricks up my sleeve to enhance flavor and nutrition, so make sure you watch until the end. Comment and let me know if you try it for yourself! Enjoy!

        Vegetable Broth At Home 😋

        Everyday is a Birthday and Celebrated as Such

        Left to right front: Judy and Grannie Bea Left to right back: Ferrin and Carlynn
        Left to right (front): Judy and Grannie Bea; (back): Ferrin and Carlynn

        Today marks my grandmother’s 98th birthday! Last year, Chevron’s former Chief Diversity Officer asked Chevron employees for their stories of resiliency. In response to that ask, I wrote about my grandmother (Grannie Bea). She is 98 years strong and she has instilled resiliency within me by her influence in my life. Her story was so welcomed by the Chevron community, read by over 6,000 employees and over 100 comments, that it spurred me to create a birthday book for her with those employee comments from all over the world to show her that her story not only has impacted me, but also those that read about her. I wanted to share her story with you as well in recognition of her birthday. #resiliency #ChevronTogether #HeAR #strongwomen

        Written October 21, 2020:

        My mom passed away in late June 2007, she was 55 years old. I had just graduated from college the year prior and moved to Houston, TX…12 hours away from my home in Mississippi.

        This story is not all sad, so please stay with me. The context of my mom’s passing is important to begin to describe my grandmother (my mom’s mom), Beatrice Barron or Grannie Bea as my sister and I call her. Grannie Bea has been a primary influence in my independence as a woman and having a successful career.

        When my mom passed, it was obviously hard for me and for Grannie Bea. A parent should never experience the loss of a child, no matter the age. Although I had always been close to Grannie Bea, my mom’s death brought us even closer. The photo of Grannie Bea, my aunt and sister…the 4 of us are the immediate family left on my mom’s side. We have all grown closer since my mom’s death and I cherish every moment of our visits, phone calls and conversations. Each of us represent my mom and keep her memory alive. I like to think that this photo represents a present-day picture of my mom. Can you see her? She is alive and well because family is a reflection of those we have lost. Lost loved ones live on within us.

        Grannie Bea will be 97 years old on November 4. She is feisty, independent and can talk the horns off a billy goat. She still lives in her house, the house that she and my grandfather built nearly 70 years ago. She lives unassisted and prefers it that way. She tells me that she feels great from the waist up but the waist down is another story. Her hips are not in the best shape. She’s in pain constantly and because of her age, surgery is out of the question and pain meds are a challenge. Her mind is clear and she can recall dates, memories and even family trees of other families just fine. Her memory works better than mine. She often will start a conversation like this, “do you remember Barbara? She was married to a Bernard, but her family was the Smith’s and her cousin is Sally and Sally married a Turner and her mom worked at the bank downtown and we all go to church together.” It’s very entertaining how she knows everyone locally in the small town of Booneville, MS. Her mind is sharp!

        Grannie Bea has made it a priority to call and check on me, especially since my mom passed. Like I mentioned earlier, Grannie Bea can TALK and she shares frequently about family history. I’ve developed a habit to have a notepad and pen close by and jot down the artifacts she shares. My aunt often refers to them as Bea-isms. 😊 I’ll share a photo of some of my collection of the notepad paper I’ve accrued during our conversations below.

        Notes from our phone conversations…

        I often think it’s ironic that her birthday falls so close to election day. She has shared with me that she has only missed voting twice (as in 2 times!) in her lifetime! She also proudly tells me she’s been a Democrat since the age of 18. And speaking of her sharp mind, she still manages 2 rental houses and the leasing of 49 acres of farmland and 30 acres of pastureland. She even meets with the farmer to discuss what crop will be grown on the acreage depending upon what the market is doing! Cotton served the farmer and her well last year because soybeans were a bust the year prior. My Grannie Bea is something else!

        My grandfather, Ruel, served in WWII and when he came home, he married Grannie Bea on March 12, 1948. They moved to Booneville, MS and bought a gas station/store and that’s was his job until they sold it in 1988. They lived in the back of the store until they could afford to build their house. Grannie Bea worked at the gas station/store after she got off work at the factory where she worked for 24 years making clothing. In 1942, she made army pants and from 1948 – 1972, she made dress shirts in her factory job.

        She remembers when electricity came to nearby cities. In 1936 electricity came to Tupelo, MS and in 1940 Corinth, MS received electricity. Although I’m so impressed with my grandmother’s memory recall, what strikes me most and inspires me to be a better person is her attitude. She’s shared with me that “everyday should be considered a birthday and celebrated as such”. She once told me that my mom and aunt didn’t have a home economics class in school, her philosophy is to “get a cookbook and teach yourself”! I often think Grannie Bea was born before her time because she doesn’t succumb to the social norms, even during her day. She worked outside the home even with having 2 daughters. She and my grandfather shared chores, she cooked, and he washed the dishes. She’s encouraged me many times to get as much education as I needed to be successful in my career and “don’t ever depend upon a man”. This is so unlike the deep south culture and I am so thankful for her encouragement to be independent!

        In my most recent conversation with her, we were discussing the pandemic and she said she’s never seen anything like this. She hasn’t been outside her house since early February. She has a great community that calls to check on her often, knocks on her door to say hello from a distance. Her spirits remain high regardless and she said, “might as well smile and laugh about it because I can’t change it”. She’s always had a positive spirit and I wonder if that has something to do with her long, quality life. Growing up as a little girl and staying at her house, she preferred to read the “funny papers”, the comics and she’d just laugh. She’s never been one for emotions, she’d tell me not to cry and always finds the silver lining in any dark cloud. She is a bright light in my life, and I feel very blessed and honored that she’s my Grannie Bea.