How We Are Shaped Along the Way 

How We Are Shaped Along The Way

The turn of a new year invites reflection. 

Before we rush into goals, plans, and resolutions, let’s pause…look back with gratitude and look ahead with humility. For me, this past year has been full of learning, both personally and professionally. It’s been a gift to walk alongside friends, family, co-workers, and even acquaintances who are willing to show up honestly through challenges, in celebrating growth, and staying curious about who they’re becoming. 

There’s a Bible verse written that’s been a constant on my whiteboard for the past couple of years: 

“Iron sharpens iron, so one person sharpens another.” 

Proverbs 27:17

I love this image, and I also think it’s easy to romanticize it. 

Scripture reminds us that transformation often begins in the renewing of our minds. When familiar patterns keep surfacing, it may be God’s invitation to see differently. I shared a reflection on that kind of perspective here

Because iron sharpening iron isn’t gentle. It’s metal against metal. There’s friction. Pressure. Resistance. Sometimes even sparks. Sharpening happens through contact, not comfort—and that means growth can feel uncomfortable, even painful at times. 

And yet, that’s how we grow. 

Growth doesn’t happen in isolation. We are shaped in relationship—through conversation, shared experience, and the willingness to be known. When we allow others to walk alongside us, to challenge us, to speak truth with care, we are sharpened. In turn, we sharpen them. Each of us becoming more refined, more aware, more grounded because we didn’t choose the easy path of staying the same. 

As we step into a new year, none of us really know what lies ahead. We don’t know the challenges or the joys that lie ahead of us in the coming months. What we do know is that we’ll walk through it one day at a time. One conversation. One decision. One foot in front of the other. 

There’s something freeing about remembering that we don’t need the whole year figured out. We only need to be present for today.  To take each day as it comes. To stay open to learning—even when that learning stretches us. To extend grace—to ourselves and to others—especially in the places where growth feels tender. 

Matthew 6:34“Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.” 

My hope for this new year is simple: that we would continue to grow together. That we would stay grounded. That we would be willing to sharpen and be sharpened—even when it’s uncomfortable. And that we would move forward—steady, intentional, and hopeful—one step at a time. 

Here’s to a new year.  May it be marked not by hurry, but by presence. 
Not by perfection, but by progress. And not by doing it all alone—but together. 

When you look back on 2025, what moments shaped you more than you expected—and what might those moments be quietly teaching you about where you’re headed next? 

Progress Doesn’t Always Equal More 

Progress Doesn't Always Equal More

Earlier this week, Jeff and I set out on a road trip to Iuka, Mississippi, to spend Christmas with my family. As we navigated out of Houston, Texas, we took the 99 East toll road to reach I-59—a route we don’t travel often. Along that stretch of toll road, we were struck by how much construction and how many new buildings were going up. 

What once were open fields and trees are now being cleared to make room for “progress.” Seeing this makes both Jeff and me feel sad. We think about the deer and other wildlife that once lived there, now pushed into smaller and smaller spaces. We also find ourselves wondering: does Houston really need more strip malls, more stores, more retail? It feels unnecessary. Like too much. 

You can feel the stress in the constant push for more. More growth. More expansion. More productivity. It never seems to be enough. That steady chaos creates a life with little room for rest, and over time, it becomes exhausting. 

As we get further away from Houston and closer to Iuka in the 12 hour drive, the landscape begins to change. The land opens up. Houses sit farther back from the road. Fences stretch across fields holding horses or cows. And beyond what I can see, something else shifts—my body begins to relax. My breathing slows. Without realizing it, I’ve been holding tension. 

Jason Shepperd, pastor at Church Project often says, “life is the balance of holding the tension between blessings and burdens.” This may sum up what I’ve been tangibly feeling, holding the tension between blessings and burdens and the big city can often feel tipped toward burdensome for me. 

It’s important to acknowledge that living in a small town doesn’t eliminate stress. People in places like Iuka still work hard, carry responsibilities, and worry about the same things we all do. Life in the United States often feels hurried and demanding, regardless of where you live. 

What feels different is the environment. A slower pace doesn’t demand the same urgency. There are fewer reminders to rush, consume, or compete. Even when life feels overwhelming, the surroundings don’t add another layer of noise. 

I’m not saying one place is better than the other. Cities like Houston offer opportunity and energy. Small towns offer quiet and space. But they ask different things of us, and our bodies seem to know the difference. 

As we near Iuka, my shoulders drop and my breath deepens. The noise fades. Maybe progress doesn’t always mean adding more. Maybe sometimes it looks like slowing down—and remembering that enough really is enough. 

As 2025 comes to a close this week, I encourage you to take a few moments and take inventory of your life. Where can you eliminate hurry and stress for the new year? 

Is it clearing out physical stress in your home, like re-organizing a closet or garage? 

Is it eliminating financial stress by choosing to buy less in the new year? 

Is it taking stock of your relationships? Choosing to spend more time with those that bring you energy versus those that may drain your energy? 

Is it creating a new or improved habit of going to the well of your Heavenly Father, John 4:14? Spending quiet time with Him? Praying more? Reading scripture? 

Is it decluttering your electronic life? Deleting apps? Turning off notifications? Cleaning up your inbox and unsubscribing? 

Or is it something else? 

This is an opportunity to say in 2026, “less is more”. 

For more ideas on creating margin in your life, Finding 1 Hour of Silence Each Week

A Time to be Thankful

A Time to be Thankful

Life seems to be moving at such a break neck speed. I’m having trouble remembering that Thanksgiving is just around the corner.

November usually signals us to count our blessings and name the people, places, and things in which we are thankful. The busyness of life holds us back from slowing down enough to be thoughtful about our blessings.

This leads us to take many people, places, and blessings for granted.

I’m very guilty of this too!

So here is a challenge today.

What would it look like if you were to take 5 minutes today to sit still and reflect on what you are thankful for in your life?

Let’s take it a step further.

What if you put a recurring reminder in your phone to take 5 minutes to be thankful each day?

What do you think that would give to you?

How would it enhance your life?

To take time to be thankful?

It might give you an opportunity to slow down and take a deep breath.

It could be a mindfulness exercise demonstrating that you have a lot more going right in your life than what you what is going wrong.

Our human brains tend to focus on what is going wrong. Therefore, it takes conscious effort to look at what is going right and be thankful.

A very wise friend once shared with me that because we focus so much on the complaints in our lives that it’s not enough to hold complaints in one hand and the positives in the other.

Rather, we have to hold the positives with both hands to truly acknowledge them.

What would it mean if you put down the complaints you have about your life for 5 minutes?

And then held what you are thankful for in both hands? What if you did this everyday?

You just might be surprised that little by little over time your mood and outlook shift to thankfulness.

So, let’s recap. Here’s your challenge:

  1. Put away any distractions.
  2. Take 5 minutes.
  3. Take a deep breath.
  4. Put down your complaints about life for those 5 minutes.
  5. Ask yourself, “what am I thankful for?” “What is going well right now?”

Bonus!

Set a recurring reminder on your phone to be thankful daily for 5 minutes each day.

Would starting your day being thankful work well for your schedule?

Or, would ending your day being thankful work better?

You decide.

Let’s start being thankful right now, today. Ready? Set. Go!

For other exercise prompts for greater overall personal well-being, check out this post about Feelings and Resiliency.

How to Protect Your Well-being

How to Protect Your Well-being

What is this picture? Any guesses?

Central Park in New York City

Why was Central Park created? Why does it make sense to have such a big park in the middle of a giant city?

Couldn’t that space be used for productivity? More buildings? More businesses? More revenue? How much revenue per square ft. do you think this space could generate?

The park is surrounded by massive skyscrapers. Relative to the space, a few more skyscrapers wouldn’t take up that much space of the park, right? How many office spaces could that be?

Central Park is 843 acres in size! It’s 2.5 miles from north to south and 0.5 miles from east to west.

It’s a National Historic Landmark and considered a masterpiece of landscape architecture.

Do you think whoever’s idea this was to have such a big, protected park in the city is crazy?

Central Park was created in 1858 to address the recreational needs of the rapidly growing city. Its purpose was to offer urban dwellers an experience of the countryside, a place to escape from the stresses of urban life and to commune with nature and other fellow New Yorkers.

In fact, Central Park has its own conservancy to preserve and celebrate Central Park as a sanctuary from the pace and pressures of city life, enhancing the enjoyment and well-being of all.

Why are we talking about Central Park?

Where is the Central Park in your life? How do you escape the pressures and stresses of life?

What do each of us have in common?

We are human beings.

As humans, we have needs and emotions that must be attended to, right?

What do you need for optimal personal well-being?

Enter the 4 pillars of well-being or resilience. You may be familiar with these 4 pillars which is part of the U.S. Air Force Comprehensive Airman Fitness.

Resilience Mental Physical Social Spiritual Logo

Think of these 4 pillars as your own Central Park, or your greenspace. Let’s break down each part.

As we review each one, ask yourself, “what do you have that’s working and what do you have that’s not working?”

Mental. Being able to cope with mental stressors and challenges. Paying attention to your needs and feelings. Your thoughts control your energy.

Physical. Being able to adopt and sustain a healthy lifestyle. Exercise, nutrition, and sleep are all important. Connecting mind and body. Strong bodies help build strong minds.

Social. Being able to network. Building and valuing interpersonal relationships. Social connections widen perceptions and grow character.

Spiritual. Being able to adhere to beliefs, principles or values needed to persevere and prevail in accomplishing missions.

What else is on the picture above with the pillars of resilience?

The arrow that points in both directions. What does that indicate to you?

Each pillar overlaps. Investment in one pillar spills into other pillars.

For example, let’s pretend you are training for a marathon. First of all, that’s a mental goal, full of positive thinking.

It’s also a very physical goal, meaning you will need to progressively train over time. You’ll need to feed your body well. You’ll need rest and sleep.

Many people that train for marathons train in groups. This is a social activity. You might be training with people that are more experienced than you, so you can learn from them. They can share tips and tricks. They will encourage you to keep going when you want to quit.

Running a marathon can also touch on the spiritual pillar. It will take perseverance to complete this goal. It’s a goal that is bigger than you.

If you are your own conservatory for your pillars, how are you doing? How well are you protecting these areas?

The Central Park conservatory works year-round, rain or shine to maintain and restore every inch of the park.

How well are you protecting your greenspace?

What rhythms do you need to add into your life? Daily, weekly, monthly, quarterly, yearly?

Each one of us has 52 weeks a year; 365 days. Is a couple weeks, or 14 days, of vacation a year sufficient to maintain or build your 4 pillars?

How are you protecting your greenspace so that you can show up for your family, your work and team, for yourself? You can’t pour from an empty glass, and you can’t help others without putting on your mask first.

Maybe this feels overwhelming because you need a lot of work in 2-3 of these pillars. Or maybe you know exactly what you need to do in only 1. Whatever the case, think about what is one small change you could make today?

Start there and build. Become your own Conservatory.

Unlocking the Power of Optimism for a Better Life

Unlocking the Power of Optimism for a Better Life

It’s no surprise that we live in a world where bad things happen. Especially if you watch the news. It can be quite depressing. It can leave us feeling pessimistic and “waiting for the next shoe to drop” so to speak.

What if you could flip the pessimism on it’s head and be more optimistic? Have you ever wondered the impact that optimism could bring to your life? Optimism might not be what you think it is.

In fact, what words or phrases come to mind when you hear the word optimistic?

  • Sunshine and rainbows
  • Rose colored glasses
  • Always happy

What about words like:

  • Successful outcomes?
  • Confidence?
  • Positivity?
  • Hopefulness?

Or phrases like:

  • Make lemonade out of life’s lemons, or
  • The glass is half full

The reality is that optimism is not all sunshine and rainbows. It’s not looking at the world through rose colored glasses either. Optimists are actually quite realistic. And just because you are an optimist, it doesn’t mean you are always happy. Nor does it mean that if you are happy, you are an optimist.

Optimism is, however, the focus of successful outcomes. It is having confidence, positivity, and hopefulness. It’s more than just being positive; it’s having a bright outlook on your future and doing what you can to make your situation better.

Optimisim is having a state of positive beliefs. Optimism is the tendency to notice and expect the positive, focus on what you can control, and take purposeful action. It is how we interpret and perceive the world around us and it’s about the action we take.

There is scientific studies on optimism. It’s been proven that it’s a cornerstone of wellbeing.

Science has also proven that optimistic people are:

  • more resilient
  • more productive, high performing
  • less likely to suffer from depression, anxiety, and burnout
  • goal setters and planners
  • more hopeful for the future.

They:

  • believe they control the direction of their lives
  • are better able to cope and recover after set-backs
  • are healthier and recover faster.

How do you cultivate optimism for your wellbeing?

When a challenge arises, do you expect the negative or expect the positive? Our brains are wired to look for what we believe. I

f you believe that you won’t achieve a goal, you are correct. Your brain will look for evidence to support that belief.

The opposite is also true. If you believe in a positive outcome, you are correct. Your brain will look for evidence to support that belief.

When a challenge arises, do you see a threat or an opportunity? Are you passive when a challenge arises or do you accept and control what you can?

Do you ruminate on the negatives of a challenge or do you focus on solutions? Do you avoid or take purposeful action? Do you isolate or hide when challenges arise or do you reach out for help?

If we are truthful, I’d imagine that we could fall on the spectrum of low or high optimism depending on the day or the circumstance. We are human after all. Optimism doesn’t mean you can’t be upset if things fall apart or get offtrack. However, it is a belief that you can make your situation better. It’s the realistic viewpoint that if everything falls apart, we get to choose how we pick it back up again.

How can you learn to be more optimistic?

First, we are aware of our thought tendencies. Then, we reframe from a pessimistic viewpoint to an optimistic thought process. It’s an intentional decision to fix the negatives and more forward…positively move forward.

Here’s your call to action.

  1. Think about 1 challenge that you’ve faced this year.
  2. What happened?
  3. How did you overcome it or pivot?
  4. What did you learn that you can apply to future, unknown challenges?

We move at lightening speed in our lives. It’s so easy to overcome or accomplish a goal and swiftly move on to the next thing. Taking a moment of reflection is important to realize how far you’ve com and how you navigated challenges.

Those reflections could help you flex your optimism muscle for future challenges.

Changing Seasons, A Rejuvenation

Changing Seasons, A Rejuvenation

A touch of crispness in the air.

That was what I felt a couple of weeks ago. The windows in the kitchen were open, and the air just felt different. Which, in turn, made me feel different.

A good different. It’s an excitement for something new. The hot, long days are turning into cooler, shorter days.

It’s a gentle awakening of my senses with the slight shifts in temperatures and the days becoming shorter.

The mornings feel ever so slightly cooler.

It’s rare in Houston, Texas, especially in September. Honestly, we don’t have much seasonal change. We have mostly summer and then a snippet of winter. Then it’s right back to summer again.

The turning from summer to fall also means:

  • football
  • pumpkins
  • pumpkin spice
  • changing leaves
  • hunting season
  • sweater weather
  • boots
  • sunsets and sun rises at different times, which make the days feel like a new experience.

When the seasons start to change, for me, it is an expectancy of welcome change.

To me, changing seasons help me have an awareness of God’s wonder…of His creation.

It helps me notice nature; to be in awe of His majesty. Read more about this at my first experience at a Silent Retreat.

Recently, I was sitting in my office, I was bathed in sunlight and warmth. I was aware of the season slowly shifting from summer to fall-ish days.

The sun has begun rising later which means brighter sun in my office. It was dancing in delight across the floor and my desk. It felt warm against my arm and face.

These are the simple and magical fleeting moments of life that remind me to be thankful. Thankful for the beauty of changing seasons.

It rejuvenates and awakens my senses because it feels and looks different. When everyday feels like the same, such as the heat of Texas summer, it’s easy to take each day for granted. But, when the air is crisper, the sun rises later, it causes me to pause and take it all in. To enjoy it.

A few years ago, when looking out my patio door, I saw a curious sight. It was something I remember seeing as a little girl back home in Mississippi, but hadn’t seen one in Houston.

Perched on the side of a pine tree in my backyard was a Polyphemus moth. These creatures are very large. Their wingspan can be close to 7 inches!

Needless to say, this moth was hard to miss. I walked outside, crouched down to get a closer look, and check out this moth. It was beautiful!

For some reason, I felt that God had shared this piece of His creation with me on that fall day. To give me pause, to notice, to look, and to admire the beauty.

I somehow also knew the sight of this moth was signaling a seasonal change. The end of summer and the close of this moth’s season too.

Seasonal changes can be hard since it also signals simultaneously a beginning and an end.

Annie F. Downs, an author and podcaster I enjoy, has dedicated a full year to exploring the seasonal changes. She examines how these changes parallel with seasonal changes of life.

She created the Seasons Guidebook to help you dive deeper into the spiritual themes of winter, spring, summer, and fall. You can listen to all the Seasons podcasts, linked here.

As the days get shorter, the air becomes cooler, and the leaves change their colors…I hope and wish that it would cause you to notice.

I hope you pause.

Enjoy it.

Be thankful.

Be grateful.

Be glad.

Let the shift awaken your senses and admire God’s creativity.

Slow down and take it all in.

Finding 1 Hour for Silence Each Week

Finding 1 Hour of Silence Each Week

This week, I listened to another great podcast. It was an interview conducted by Ken Coleman with Carlos Whittaker in the Front Row Seat podcast, linked here.

Highly recommend a listen!

The reason I listened wasn’t because I knew who Carlos Whittaker was. I didn’t. Rather, it was the title of the interview, Simple Daily Habits to Get Years of Your Life Back. My interest was piqued.

Who doesn’t want more time back in your life?

This conversation would be about Carlos’ journey with the amount of time spent on his phone.

He was spending 7 hours a day on his phone. Calculate that out…that’s 49 hours a week! That’s a full-time job! In his calculations, he discovered that maintaining this rate would lead to spending 10 years of his remaining life on his phone!

We can all be convicted about how much screen time we have each day. I know I can. My current rate is around 4 hours a day. I’d like to improve this to no more than 3 hours a day, maybe even less.

What is your daily screen time rate?

Carlos shares the extreme measures he took to re-center and reconnect his life. This includes living with monks and then an Amish family for a while!

As the interview progressed, Carlos recommended that everyone find one (1) hour each week for total silence. He gave the example of finding a park bench and sitting there with no phone. Take nothing to read. Just sit in silence. One (1) hour each week, that’s it.

He re-discovered, when he put his phone down, how much we’ve lost the art to wonder and be curious when we can Google the answer to any question in a split second. We’ve forgotten how to notice and be aware because our phones have all our attention.

I’m also a big believer in silence and stillness. I was excited that Carlos encouraged this practice!

When I share that I have attended 2 silent retreats, people often look at me like I’m crazy. But, what I have found is that silence and stillness are tools for navigating the modern world. The modern world is never quiet.

You can watch a video I made about attending Awaken Silent Retreat here.

We weren’t designed to consume so much information or to be available to everyone all the time.

The question to ask yourself is, “What am I missing?”

What are you missing by never allowing yourself a moment of

  • reflection
  • silence
  • wonder
  • curiosity?

What are you missing by allowing your phone to have all your attention?

What are you missing by filling every second with something?

What would happen if you had that 1 hour of silence every week?

What might be available for you in the hour of silence?

The truth is you don’t know until you try it. You won’t know until you try it as a practice.

Prompt: Try practicing 1 hour of silence each week for a month. Then, re-evaluate.

After listening to the podcast, I went for a walk. I walk every evening in my neighborhood.

I decided to bring my phone, but keep it in my pocket.

Notifications off.

No listening to music.

No listening to a podcast.

No talking on the phone.

No texting.

Just walk and silence.

What I found was that my mind was going 90 miles an hour. I was thinking about ALL the things I wanted to get done or needed to get done. I was making a to do list in my mind.

But after 15 minutes of walking in silence, my mind got quieter. And by the end of the walk, my to do list wasn’t important. I had downshifted.

I noticed a beautiful home for sale in my neighborhood. I also observed wild ducks perched in trees and even on top of roofs.

What would I have missed if I continued to use my phone while on my walk instead of choosing silence?

I would have missed the chance to downshift from my busy day.

I would have missed the chance to let the to-do list float away.

I would have missed smiling at the silly, wild ducks on top of roofs.

I would have missed a chance to allow myself to relax.

Our world is filled with distractions. The world is not going to allow you to not be distracted.

That’s your choice. You get to choose.

You get to decide on electing a little bit of silence in your life instead of more distraction.

If this is a goal you’d like to incorporate in your life. I can help with that!

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Thank you for your response. ✨

Battling the Hard Parts of Life with Therapy

Battling the Hard Parts of Life with Therapy

May – Mental Health Awareness Month

May is Mental Health Awareness month, and I would like to share my journey with therapy with you. You might recall the Career Confessions series I wrote recently. Part of the “confession” was my struggle with anxiety. Early on, it interfered with my work and job search. 

Why Therapy?

The journey with therapy, however, started for me in college. A visit here and there to the on-campus therapist was grounding. At the time, my mom had cancer and being away from home for this first time was hard. I had tough life questions. The therapist on campus helped me zoom out and then zoom in to the questions. This process allowed me to have a more balanced thought process. How many times are we so focused on a question or situation? We can’t zoom out from it to gain a better perspective. For me, it’s often. 😊 A therapist can help with that! 

Therapy Journey

A large part to my therapy journey is about my mom. She was sick much of my childhood. I was one of her caretakers while growing up. I was a primary caretaker from the ages of 15 – 18 (until I went off to college). I grew up fast! I was nominated as “Most Dependable” my senior year of high school. While it was an honor to receive that nomination, I earned it in my private home life. I learned the ultimate dependability by being my mom’s caretaker. 

There are a lot of positives that come from learning responsibility at a young age. However, it can also be very confusing. Caretaking an adult is hard for an adult let alone a child doing so. At the age of 25, my mom passed away. She was 55. I don’t think anyone is prepared to lose a parent. Losing my mom unearthed some “life stuff” I needed to address. I sought out therapy to talk through my mom’s death. There was a lot of processing I needed to do. Sometimes we are so close to a situation that we can’t see the full picture. A therapist can help with that. 

Therapy = Advocacy

I have learned through therapy that my mother’s sickness shaped me, both good and bad. The good is easier to hold some days than the bad. It’s easy to become fixated on one or the other. The point of therapy is to help you hold or see all aspects about yourself. At first, if you struggle with doing this, your therapist is there to help you until you are able to do it on your own. This is where advocacy comes into play and why it means so much at my core. My therapist has been my advocate in so many ways. Giving words to situations when I had none. She gave me a voice when I didn’t have one. And she has been there to hold my hand in all the hard things that I’ve been through. I can honestly say I would not be here right now if it weren’t for the gift of therapy. It has been life-changing. I have learned life-changing skills in therapy from navigating difficult relationships, to work challenges, to having compassion for myself. And having compassion for yourself is key to having compassion for others. Looking in the mirror, in my opinion, can be the biggest adversary you face. I know it has been for me. I can certainly stand in my own way. Therapy can help you get out of your own way! 

Life is Short

Therapy is hard, not going to lie. I don’t always like my therapist. She pushes me to look at the hard parts of life. She encourages me to talk about and process them too. Therapy has given me centeredness, truth, and grounding that is priceless. Maybe I would have gotten to this place on my own. Even if I had, it would have taken me so much longer. And don’t we deserve to get to a better place in life as fast as we can? Life is a vapor, James 4:14.  

Work on Yourself…for You and Others

A wise friend told me once, “Our work on ourselves is a lifetime and one day.” This means we are always inching toward being better versions of ourselves. Another quote that resonated with me: “The more we can understand our own thoughts, feelings, and emotions, the more we can understand someone else’s.” This is so true! The better you can see yourself, the better you can see others. There’s certainly more I could write about, but I will pause here. I hope this helps you seek a therapist if you’ve been thinking about it. And if you’ve never thought about it, I hope this helps you see a different side to therapy. I think we could all use a good therapist in our lives. Life is hard enough, and we deserve to be better people, for ourselves and each other. 

Video Testimonial for Awaken Silent Retreat

Awaken Silent Retreat Video Testimonial

Last week, I wrote a post about attending Awaken Silent Retreat in November 2024. If reading a testimonial isn’t your thing, I have a video testimonial for you instead! Watch now!

Exodus 14:14 – The Lord will fight for you; you need only be still.

Psalms 46:10 – Be still and know that I am God.

By the way, I get questions all the time about my lashes. This is my secret.

What do you think about getting away to a silent retreat? Or starting with a couple of minutes of silence in your daily life? I’d love to hear from you in the comments below!

Silence and Stillness: Tools for a Noisy, Modern World

This article was originally published in Tish Co News.

What is a Silent Retreat?

In November 2024, I drove all the way to Higden, Arkansas for a silent retreat hosted by Awaken Silent Retreat. Silent retreat = no talking and silent rest. Practicing silence means turning off and putting away all distractions. This helps us to better hear from God and the prompting of the Holy Spirit. It’s a spiritual discipline. It’s also a practice of being with yourself and hearing your own thoughts and voice. It’s a practice of resting. I’ve been practicing silence and stillness for a few years, read about it here.

How to Know if You Are a Good Candidate for a Silent Retreat?

How often are you quiet during the day? How often do you truly rest? When you lay down at night, is this the first time that you are quiet with no distractions? Does your mind spring to life with thoughts and worries? Yep, mine too. This means I’m not allowing time in the day, to think, to pray, or to process. In fact, I often work hard to keep from having to think, process, or feel because it seems overwhelming. It takes a lot of energy to keep pushing things down or away. This might be why feeling tired and overwhelmed are commonplace these days. We aren’t allowing space to just be; to be a human being instead of a human doing. When I first heard about this silent retreat, it was on a podcast, Prosperity with Purpose. The podcaster, Jessica Hefley, had recently attended. They had many wonderful things to say about it, and I immediately wanted to experience it too. She described it as a way to eliminate distraction, crowds, and hurry which stands between us and peace. These are tools the enemy uses to keep us separated from God.

Jesus spoke to his disciples in Mark 6:31a. He said, “Come away with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”

I didn’t know much about this retreat. However, I trusted Jessica Hefley’s review on her podcast, Silent Retreat to 10x Your Life. So, I sought it out, signed up, and prepared myself to drive 7 hours to attend. That’s a key indicator that I was craving peace and rest. The drive wasn’t difficult at all. Much of the travel was familiar to me. This is because we usually travel through Arkansas on our way home to Iuka, MS.

Awakened in the Silence

Silent Retreat Experience

Once I arrived, I was greeted by Danielle, who was leading us that weekend. It was going to be a small group, only 5 of us. After introductions, we ate dinner all while still talking and getting to know one another. Then, we gathered in the living room. Danielle led us in a few songs of worship. She prepared our minds with scripture and then we closed with prayer. We turned off our phones and turned them in for the weekend, and we shifted into silence. Each of us had our own bedrooms and I quickly retired to mine. I was tired from the day’s drive. My usual routine for bed is watching TV and being on my phone. I had neither and I slept 8 hours that night! When I awoke and emerged from my room, breakfast had already been made. I took my coffee outside on the deck and then proceeded down to the lake shore to explore. I noticed deer and dog prints in the mud and the small, smooth rocks along the shore. I sat on top of a big rock overlooking the lake. Fishermen in boats would wave as they passed by. There was an island directly across from shore and kayaks could be used to get there. One of the ladies from the retreat had struck out on an island adventure. She was braver than I. I wandered back up to the cabin. I really didn’t want to read a book while I was at the retreat. I wanted to be silent and hear from God. My mind was not cooperating. I remembered Danielle’s prompting that sometimes it’s better to focus your mind on a book. I pulled from the library the one she recommended, “Living Fearlessly” by Jamie Winship. The book was incredibly helpful with prayer prompts and encouragement for listening for God’s voice. The book recommended to pray and write down what you hear or sense from God. Looking up from the book, I found myself noticing the leaves drop from the trees. This is what I wrote in my journal:

“Methodical drops. Not one leaf in a hurry, making its decent gracefully with swoops and spins. Not to be rushed. The leaves fall joyfully. The season changing and the leaves don’t try to stay. When it’s their time to go, they let go and fall freely. Not a worry or bother. They are doing what they are supposed to do. No argument, only a delightful freefall to make a crunchy carpet on the ground.” 

Silence and Stillness

Later, my attention was brought to the squirrels. I wrote about them, too: 

“Scampering squirrels. Jumping from one branch to another. They must weigh a few ounces because the branches barely move under their weight. Back and forth they scale at least 15 trees. Never a misstep. They are skilled tree climbers and jumpers. Never needing the ground to get to where they are going, instead they navigate tree city. Scampering to gather food for the day. Methodically searching for the day’s allotment. They don’t spin or toll. They know they will be provided for; their creator provides for them.”  

Silence

That evening, I found another big rock to perch upon with a blanket and watched over the lake. I loved seeing all nature’s details. The vibrant green weeds against the stark contrast of the rust brown rocks, the dormant gray trees and grass. The white and yellow flowers on the weeds. I was still and silent with no distractions. Because of this, I noticed all the landscape colors. I slept for 9 hours that night. We remained silent until 10:00 am on Sunday for a total of 40 hours of silence. After we broke our silence, Danielle led us with worship songs and scripture. We each shared what our experience had been. God met each of us right where we needed Him…all in unique and different ways. For me, it was God bringing me into the present to notice the leaves, the squirrels, and the color palette along the shoreline. My mind is usually so distracted with worries that it’s hard to be present. All in all, it was an absolute wonderful experience and I already went back for another one this April! (I’ll write about that experience soon too!)

Silence is an Neglected Gift

Our world is filled with distractions. Unless we are intentional with who and what is gaining our attention, the distractions will win every time. The silent retreat was a way to encourage me to find pockets of time to be silent. To put away the phone, take a walk in nature, and be silent and still. Silence is rare and an often-neglected gift.