Silent Retreat 2025: Distractions

Silent Retreat 2025: Distractions

If you haven’t had a chance to catch up, make sure to read Part 1 and Part 2 of the Silent Retreat 2025 series.

I’ve been writing a lot lately about combating all the distractions we have in our everyday lives. Our modern world is distracting!

Distractions at a silent retreat can happen too. In Part 2, I wrote about the tremendous rain and storms that happened in the area. The weather, of course, was distracting.

There was another distraction for me that weekend, though. Right after we turned in our phones that first night, I found wasps in my room. Not 1, not 2, but 3 wasps in my bathroom!

Danielle helped me kill them. After she left, I was jumpy because I didn’t know where they came from or if there were more. And I knew I had to sleep in my bed that night. I would need to revisit my bathroom to shower!

I felt vulnerable and exposed. I managed to shower successfully without any more wasps. As I was getting ready for bed, I noticed a wasp in the window.

The room I was in had a loft to it. There was a ladder and a bunk up overhead and the wasp was up high on the window. I prayed that he’d just stay there.

I was able to sleep fairly well that evening. The next morning as I was getting ready, I noticed a wasp on the floor. I thought it was already dead but decided to step on it anyway. It was not already dead…

This is now 4 wasps that have been killed in my room.

When I came back to my room later that afternoon, there were 2 more wasps in my bathroom. Danielle had gotten some wasp spray. I retrieved it and put it to use. The wasp I sprayed with it…well, it seemed to only make it angry!

It crawled into a crevice in the baseboard. “Great!” I thought. I sprayed more wasp spray in the crevice. Out it came, seemingly more angry. I stepped on it and cleaned up the residue of the spray.

The other wasp was in the shower. I took my wash cloth and swatted at it. It clung to the wash cloth. I dropped it, of course. Finally, I was able to step on that one too.

“Where in the world are they coming from?” I thought to myself. That was the eeriest part of it. Not knowing where they were coming from or how many more there were.

That night was not as restful. I seriously considered not taking a shower. Mainly because I didn’t want to be caught exposed having to battle another wasp.

I made a deal with myself that I would shower, but it would be fast. I had planned to wash my hair, and decided against it.

Showering was successful. No other wasps.

I got ready for bed and laid down to read. While reading, I noticed a wasp flying high above me in the loft area. I had the ceiling fan on and I hoped that would do the trick. Maybe he will just leave me alone. I’m leaving him alone and thinking surely he’d leave me alone too.

I turned out the light and tried to sleep. No. such. luck. I tossed and turned and for sure the wasp was on my mind.

I turned the lamp back on again and sat up in bed. I didn’t want to read anymore. Coloring in my devotional coloring book it is!

It’s still storming outside, by the way. Rain is continuing to beat down. Lightening is lighting up the night sky and rumbles of thunder follow.

I colored for a long while. I kept my eye on the wasp every once and while. He was still flying above me from time to time.

Around 2:30 in the morning, the wasp made his move. He flew down close to me, the buzzing close to my ear. He landed on the wall close to my bedside.

Nope! Nope! Ok, I’m done.

This is wasp number 7. I did not want to attempt to kill this one. It’s early in the morning. If I miss and get stung, I’m going to be alone to deal with it. And I didn’t want to wake the rest of the house either.

While keeping my eyes fixated on this wasp, I gathered my pillow and a bag and went downstairs.

After getting downstairs, I thought about it for a minute. I decided to go back up and get all the rest of my things too. I was done with the eerie wasps.

There was a half bathroom downstairs that I could get ready in the next morning. And I could sleep on one of the couches in the living room.

And that’s what I did. I colored more first. This was me trying to calm my nerves about the wasps. I relaxed finally and laid down to sleep.

The rain still pouring outside. Lightening and thundering too.

I believe the wasps were a distraction tactic by the enemy. Doesn’t the enemy want to keep you from God? Why would the enemy be happy about your trying to spend uninterrupted time with God?

While I knew this was true and I prayed about it, and prayed for the wasps to go away. They didn’t.

What I also thought was interesting was the wasps, when I killed them were fairly easy to kill. They didn’t put up much of a fight, didn’t fly at me. They were slow. They weren’t flying very much and they weren’t able to defend themselves well.

When I talked with my dad later that day on the way home, I told him about them. He said they had been hibernating and were emerging but stiff and not as agile.

What I know to be true is the enemy has no authority over us unless we agree to his lies. The enemy is weak in comparison to our God.

The wasps were scary. Knowing they were in the room was scary, but they didn’t pose as much of a threat as they appeared. I wasn’t stung, but the threat was there.

I believe that the wasps were a representation of the enemy and his lies. However, truth is more powerful and always holds authority over evil.

I also think there is a significance to there being 7 wasps. The number 7 is very significant in the Bible.

*It appears over 700 times in the Bible.

*The significance of the number 7 represents perfection and completion.

*Creation happened in 7 days. – Genesis 1; 2: 1-2

*God rested on the 7th day.

*It is exoneration and healing.

*It is a fulfillment of promises and oaths.

*Reference linked from christianity.com.

The wasps nor the enemy were successful that weekend in their distractions.

They were minor distractions that I needed to deal with and handle.

The Silent Retreat weekend was fruitful in rest, safety, and connection with the Heavenly Father.

And I’d do it all again. May I take the experience of the wasps with me as I encounter other distractions and fears.

May I remember:

I pray that you also stand on these truths the next time you encounter fear distracting you from the Father’s love.

Stay tuned for another installment of my Silent Retreat weekend next week!

Silent Retreat 2025: Being Present

Silent Retreat 2025: Being Present

Make sure to read Part 1 of my experience at Awaken Silent Retreat.

The prayer path continued on the other side of the creek. I wasn’t able to cross, so I backtracked to the main gravel road. 

From there, I had 2 choices. Turn right back to the cabin or go left and see what else I could find.

I chose left and spotted another path connected to a very wide expanse of rock shore next to the creek.

I could hear the sound of the moving water, and I heard the sound of falling water hitting rock. It was much like the sound of a good, heavy rain hitting concrete. 

On the opposite side of the creek was a rock and tree embedded mountainside. I was searching for where the sound of falling water was coming from. I couldn’t see it, only hear it.

I walked closer letting sound be my guide, and found it! The morning’s storm had made little waterfalls coming off the mountainside. The water was smacking the rock as it fell.

I sat down on the rocky bank to take it all in. Being so close to the water, I was entertained with the tiniest fish jumping out of the water’s surface. I couldn’t help but think it was God’s smile. I was sitting still, not distracted. I was taking time to relish in His beautiful creation. 

Sitting there, I was reminded of a guided meditation I once experienced. It was guiding me to clear my mind. When a thought came to mind, it told me to think about moving water in a creek. Release the thought and let it be washed away with the moving water. 

For someone who’s mind never stops having thoughts, this was an exercise and analogy that stuck. It’s a great visual tool.

Sin and baptism. Washing away in the water.

As I watched the moving water, I’m noticed the logs, sticks, and leaves that was being carried in it’s current. Carrying them away much like my thoughts.

Between the falling water that sounded like rain, to the sound of the moving, gurgling water, the water lapping the rock shore, and seeing the water move at the same pace and rhythm…this was its own guided meditation. 

God’s guided meditation.

Tan, brown water. Rock mountainside with pops of vibrant green. 

Rock shore with smooth river rock all shapes, sizes, and all smooth. I’m sure from the moving water. Tan, cream, rust, red, yellow, orange, white rocks speckling the shoreline. 

I sat there capturing the scenery with my journal and pen. I didn’t have a camera with me, and I wanted to hold this beautiful place and moment in my memory.

There was more weather moving in. It was evident by the distant thunder rumbling and the darkening skies. I knew my time by the creek was coming to an end, so I walked back up the main gravel road back to the cabin.

I made it back just in time as the pouring rain began again and lunch was ready too.

Danielle always makes wonderful meals for us. Lunch was a charcuterie board spread across the counter with a delightful assortment of meats, cheeses, fruits, nuts, crackers, etc. 

After lunch, it was still raining. The cabin had a large front porch with several rocking chairs. I snagged a rocking chair and watched the rain.

When I say it stormed and down poured rain, I mean it really did! Thunder so loud and booming it shook the ground beneath me. The rain did not let up!

Regardless, several of the ladies, including myself, sat and rocked, and enjoyed the storm. I read the Living Fearless book again. This book has prayer and journal prompts. Highly recommend!

My hubby had given me a birthday present for my trip. Complete with my favorite snacks and a devotional coloring book. I had not colored in so long and this was a perfect opportunity.

Rocking, watching the rain, coloring, reading, journaling, feeling the thunder underneath me.

God is powerful, peaceful, and mighty. Rain, lightening, and thunder…peaceful yet mighty and powerful.

The rain continued. Danielle was keeping tabs on the weather. She let us know we were also under a tornado warning.

How do you communicate with others when you are at a silent retreat? Good old fashioned paper, pen, and the passing of notes. 

And even though torrential storms surrounded us, I never felt fear. Instead, I felt like God had tucked me under His wing. He was taking care of us. And I knew that this was a special time with Him. 

What does it mean to spend uninterrupted time with God? What do you do with the time?

Ask God to lead the way. What do you feel prompted to do after you’ve asked God to lead the way?

  • Read your Bible
  • Read a book
  • Color
  • Sit
  • Walk
  • Knit
  • Cross Stitch
  • Pray
  • Journal
  • Rest
  • Something else?

There are many things you could do during silent time with God. The important thing is to ask Him and let Him lead.

Don’t come into silence with an agenda of what you want to do or get done. Let Him lead the way. 

Both times I’ve attended Awaken Silent Retreats, God has brought my attention to His beautiful creation. I’m not an outdoorsy type usually. I think this is God’s way of slowing me down, bringing me into being present, and reminding me of who’s I am.

There’s more of my Silent Retreat experience to unpack. Stay tuned for next week’s installment!

Silent Retreat 2025: Personal Wellbeing

A few months ago, I wrote about my first experience attending Awaken Silent Retreat, posts linked here and here.

And only 5 months later, I attended again. This time on my birthday weekend!

The Silent Retreat was in a different location this time. It was hosted at Shepherd of the Ozarks (SOTO), located in the heart of the Ozark mountains in Harriett, Arkansas.

The total drive for me was around 8 hours from Houston, Texas to Harriett, Arkansas.

I had never been to the Ozark Mountains before. It is beautiful! The last hour of the drive was breathtaking! It reminded me of the Smoky Mountains.

When I arrived, I parked and unloaded my car only to reload my things into a truck. The truck would cross the creek and take me the remaining distance to the cabin.

The creek crossing reminded me of the creek you cross going to J.P. Coleman State Park. My Iuka, Mississippi friends will know what I mean.

But the creek at SOTO was much larger and required a 4-wheel drive vehicle.

The weather forecast was looking like a lot of rain. What we didn’t know is that there would be record breaking rain that weekend.

Silent Retreat 2025: Personal Wellbeing

After unloading our things, we settled into the kitchen where a meal had thoughtfully been prepared for all of us.

As you can see from the photo, there were 19 ladies in attendance.

The cabin was gigantic, about 7,600 square feet. It was 3 levels with numerous bedrooms. Plenty of room to spread out both in the cabin and on the front and back porches.

All during dinner, there was talking and conversation. After dinner, we gathered in the living area. Danielle led us in worship songs and scripture. She guided us in an exercise to use our holy imagination that prepared our minds for the weekend of silence.

Then, with our phones turned into Danielle, we shifted into silence.

When I returned to my room, I was met with interesting visitors in the bathroom. Not 1, not 2, but 3 wasps were in my bathroom! I had to summon help from Danielle to get rid of them.

The wasps would prove to be interesting violators of my silent weekend.

It rained, thundered, and lightened much of the night. As the day broke, so did the weather. Many of the ladies were going outside to explore the outdoors. It was beautiful scenery at SOTO. I had heard some of them talk about a prayer walk the night before. The hike had signs with scripture prompts along the path. This is where I wanted to go.

I packed up my journal and pen in my bag. Grabbed a coffee to go and set out to find this path. I found the prayer walk and started to doubt if I should continue. Since it had been raining the night prior, it was muddy and where the path began, it was steep. I hesitated, but decided to at least go a little ways before giving up.

My next hurdle was wooden planks that served as bridges without hand rails over shallow ravines. When stepping on the wooden planks, they bowed under my weight. I must have stepped forward and stepped backward at least 3 or 4 times.

I was out of my comfort zone. And then I laughed at myself, “says the girl that drove 8 hours alone to be at a silent retreat.”

This gave me gusto to cross the plank quickly only to be met with a second plank to cross. I didn’t hesitate as much with this one.

I came to the first scripture prompt, Psalms 96, a psalm of praise. It seemed so appropriate given the beautiful mountains and the gurgling creek below me. I sat in silence and read the scripture through again and enjoyed the sights of the beautiful landscape.

The next scripture prompt on the path was Psalms 32:1-7, a psalm of confession.

“When I kept silent, my bones wasted away through my groaning all day long. For day and night your hand was heavy upon me; my strength was sapped as in the heat of summer. Then I acknowledged my sin to you and did not cover up my iniquity.”

I was struck with how the verse spoke to me. If I hide and keep sin in my life a secret, I will waste away. Sin is detrimental physically, mentally, emotionally, and spiritually. The part about “your hand was heavy upon me” says to me that your conscious is speaking about the sin. Sin preoccupies our lives and takes our strength. The relief from the bind of sin is to confess it to the Lord.

This was an humbling experience on the prayer path…to sit in silence and to sit with truth.

I continued on the path only to come to another crossing. The path continued on the other side of the creek. I was wearing tennis shoes and given the rain the night before, the creek was high.

I decided I would not cross. Instead I found a makeshift perch on a rock and decided to sit and take in God’s beauty He created.

Because I did not have my phone or camera, my journal and pen served to capture the beauty.

It’s easy to forget to use all our senses when we experience something. We carry these mini computers with us all day, i.e. phones. It’s easy to snap a photo, but what else other than the visual did you experience?

Writing down what I was seeing, hearing, and feeling helped me capture the moment and embed it in my mind. Here’s what I wrote:

“Water gurgling and bubbling. Water falling that sounds like water filling up a bathtub. Very vibrant greens from the moss on the sides of the trees and rocks to the grass and buds on awakening trees from their winter’s nap. The simplicity of beauty. The grass, the trees, the moss, and the water doing nothing other than what they were designed to do. No rush, no busy, just being what they are supposed to be. They are all enough, more than enough. Flowing water around the bend and out of sight. Not in a hurry, but a constant flow. Roots that create the perfect natural stair steps to the water. Lavender flowers. Are those weeds? Does it matter? I’ve never seen this place. It feels like a gift from God as I journeyed to spend uninterrupted time with Him. The temperature is perfect. Not hot, not cold. Mossy, velvet carpet. Soft to the touch. And purple flowers popping out here and there among the fresh greenery.”

If you’ve been reading my blog, you may find that I write often about silence and stillness. Silence and stillness are tools. They are spiritual disciplines. They are practices to have greater personal wellbeing.

Our modern world is noisy and busy.

What are you missing by getting swept away in the constant demand on your time and the distractions?

What if you carved out time for silence and stillness? What do you think would happen?

Maybe you’d notice and experience the world around you like I experienced being in the mountains and by the creek.

Maybe you’d experience all of your senses.

Maybe you’d be aware of more.

Many think that silence is taking things away, like your phone and distractions. While that’s true, what’s also true is thinking about what silence could give you/add back instead.

Stay tuned! Next week, I’ll continue writing about my experience with a Silent Retreat weekend.

Finding 1 Hour for Silence Each Week

Finding 1 Hour of Silence Each Week

This week, I listened to another great podcast. It was an interview conducted by Ken Coleman with Carlos Whittaker in the Front Row Seat podcast, linked here.

Highly recommend a listen!

The reason I listened wasn’t because I knew who Carlos Whittaker was. I didn’t. Rather, it was the title of the interview, Simple Daily Habits to Get Years of Your Life Back. My interest was piqued.

Who doesn’t want more time back in your life?

This conversation would be about Carlos’ journey with the amount of time spent on his phone.

He was spending 7 hours a day on his phone. Calculate that out…that’s 49 hours a week! That’s a full-time job! In his calculations, he discovered that maintaining this rate would lead to spending 10 years of his remaining life on his phone!

We can all be convicted about how much screen time we have each day. I know I can. My current rate is around 4 hours a day. I’d like to improve this to no more than 3 hours a day, maybe even less.

What is your daily screen time rate?

Carlos shares the extreme measures he took to re-center and reconnect his life. This includes living with monks and then an Amish family for a while!

As the interview progressed, Carlos recommended that everyone find one (1) hour each week for total silence. He gave the example of finding a park bench and sitting there with no phone. Take nothing to read. Just sit in silence. One (1) hour each week, that’s it.

He re-discovered, when he put his phone down, how much we’ve lost the art to wonder and be curious when we can Google the answer to any question in a split second. We’ve forgotten how to notice and be aware because our phones have all our attention.

I’m also a big believer in silence and stillness. I was excited that Carlos encouraged this practice!

When I share that I have attended 2 silent retreats, people often look at me like I’m crazy. But, what I have found is that silence and stillness are tools for navigating the modern world. The modern world is never quiet.

You can watch a video I made about attending Awaken Silent Retreat here.

We weren’t designed to consume so much information or to be available to everyone all the time.

The question to ask yourself is, “What am I missing?”

What are you missing by never allowing yourself a moment of

  • reflection
  • silence
  • wonder
  • curiosity?

What are you missing by allowing your phone to have all your attention?

What are you missing by filling every second with something?

What would happen if you had that 1 hour of silence every week?

What might be available for you in the hour of silence?

The truth is you don’t know until you try it. You won’t know until you try it as a practice.

Prompt: Try practicing 1 hour of silence each week for a month. Then, re-evaluate.

After listening to the podcast, I went for a walk. I walk every evening in my neighborhood.

I decided to bring my phone, but keep it in my pocket.

Notifications off.

No listening to music.

No listening to a podcast.

No talking on the phone.

No texting.

Just walk and silence.

What I found was that my mind was going 90 miles an hour. I was thinking about ALL the things I wanted to get done or needed to get done. I was making a to do list in my mind.

But after 15 minutes of walking in silence, my mind got quieter. And by the end of the walk, my to do list wasn’t important. I had downshifted.

I noticed a beautiful home for sale in my neighborhood. I also observed wild ducks perched in trees and even on top of roofs.

What would I have missed if I continued to use my phone while on my walk instead of choosing silence?

I would have missed the chance to downshift from my busy day.

I would have missed the chance to let the to-do list float away.

I would have missed smiling at the silly, wild ducks on top of roofs.

I would have missed a chance to allow myself to relax.

Our world is filled with distractions. The world is not going to allow you to not be distracted.

That’s your choice. You get to choose.

You get to decide on electing a little bit of silence in your life instead of more distraction.

If this is a goal you’d like to incorporate in your life. I can help with that!

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6 Ways to Know If Coaching is Right for You?

6 Ways to Know If Coaching is Right for You?

Meet My Ideal Client

You don’t need to be in crisis to benefit from coaching. You do, however, need clarity, curiosity, and a desire to grow. Whether you’re navigating a career pivot, leading a team, getting your finances in order, or simply longing for a more grounded life, the type of coaching I offer creates the space to pause, reflect, and move forward with purpose.

So how do you know if coaching with me is right for you?

Let’s take a look.

You Want to Grow, Not Just Survive

You may feel capable, but also stuck. You’ve read the books, listened to the podcasts, made the lists, and still aren’t moving the needle the way you hoped. Coaching helps you break out of survival mode and step into strategic, intentional growth.

You’re Ready to Get Clear and Take Action

Many of my clients come to coaching with vague goals. They express a desire such as “I want a better job.” Some say, “I need to stop overspending.” Others mention, “I just want to feel more at peace.” Coaching helps define what “better,” “stop,” and “peace” actually look like, and then map a path to get there.

You’re Open to Support and Feedback

Coaching is not consulting or therapy; it’s a collaborative process. I’ll ask the questions you may not have thought to ask. I’ll notice patterns, challenge assumptions, and offer frameworks to help you see and move differently. That works best when you’re open to honest reflection, feedback, and practical support.

You Want to Lead, Communicate, and Live with Integrity

Whether you’re leading a team or leading your own life, how you show up matters. I help you improve communication with peers, teams, and senior leaders. We work on presence, empathy, clarity, and confidence…not as buzzwords, but as daily practices.

You’re Done Hustling Without a Plan

You don’t have to white-knuckle your way through life. If you’re tired of feeling busy but ineffective, you’re in the right place. If you want to shift from spinning your wheels to seeing real progress, this is where you belong. We’ll use proven tools to help you slow down, set intentional goals, and make peace a priority.

What You Bring to the Table: The Client’s Role

Great coaching is a two-way relationship. If you’re considering coaching with me, here’s what I ask of you:

  • Have a goal in mind that you want to achieve.
  • Recognize that you haven’t been successful reaching it on your own.
  • Be curious about what’s missing and open to support.
  • Show up prepared to discuss your progress and challenges.
  • Be ready to apply the resources and tools we discuss.
  • Be open to transformational change and the work required to get there.
  • Be willing to experiment with new strategies.
  • Be committed to your goals, and persistent in pursuing them.

If that sounds like you, coaching can be a powerful catalyst. Let’s get started!

If you’re not quite there yet — that’s okay too. Sometimes readiness is the first step.

Let’s Talk

Curious if coaching is right for this season of your life? I’d love to hear your story and explore how we might work together.

Let’s connect and start mapping your next step with purpose, clarity, and momentum.

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Halfway Through 2025: New Year’s Goals Revisited

Halfway Through 2025: New Year's Goals Revisited

Did you blink? Yep — it’s June already!

Maybe your New Year’s Goals are thriving. Or, maybe they’re MIA?

Either way, you’re halfway through the year.

Most of us set ambitious goals in January and then quietly abandon them month by month. Not because we’re lazy, but because we focus on what we want… not how we’ll get there.

Let’s explore a better way to achieve our goals.

Start With the Goal

What goal (or goals) did you set?

Defining your goal is a great start. What makes the difference between goal setting and accomplishing your goals is strategy. Strategy is how you will accomplish your goals. This year, I’ve been studying for the Psychology of Leadership certificate program with Cornell University. Part of this program includes diving into the psychology of getting things done.

What I’ve learned has helped me approach goals differently. It’s less about pressure and stress, and not about relying on motivation and momentum. It’s about progress, not perfection.

1. Make Your Goals Stretch…Just Enough

Goals should feel like a challenge. They need to stretch you beyond your comfort zone. Far enough to spark focus, but not so far they leave you overwhelmed.

For example, my workout routine already consists of 4 days of workouts each week. One of my goals is to add a 5th cardio day to my weekly workouts. It’s not a total overhaul — just enough to push me physically without burning me out.

2. Stack New Habits Onto Old Ones

One of my favorite strategies? Habit stacking. It’s the idea of anchoring a new habit to something you already do.

If you already make coffee every morning, you could pair that moment with a review of your top three tasks. Or if you already set your phone on the charger at night, use that moment to write down one thing you’re grateful for.

This takes effort out of your system, and lets routine do the work.

It’s important to note that often we think we should push ourselves into accomplishing a goal. This will lead to burnout! You can’t rely on motivation because life happens and our motivation muscles get fatigued. Use your routine to add on or tweak here and there. This strategy is so much more sustainable long term.

3. Use If-Then Planning (a.k.a. Implementation Intentions)

Want to follow through on your goals more consistently? Implementation intentions can help. It’s about creating a trigger-based plan: *”If X happens, then I will do Y.”

For example: “If it’s Monday between 5-6 pm, then I will workout.” Or “If it’s bedtime, I will read my daily Bible reading through Bible Recap.”

These small, specific cues reduce the need for motivation, and increase follow-through.

4. Break It Down with Mini Goals

Big goals can feel overwhelming. That’s why it’s helpful to break them down into weekly or monthly mini-goals. These smaller wins build momentum and give you natural check-in points to see what’s working or what needs to shift.

For example, instead of “Payoff $10,000 in debt this year,” maybe I track:

  • Pay $833.33 toward debt each month
  • Earn an extra $208.33 each week

Now the goal isn’t a vague aspiration — it’s a system with checkpoints.

5. Build in Feedback Loops

The best goals aren’t fixed — they evolve. Ask: “Is this working?” “Is this still meaningful?” “What’s getting in the way?”

Goals should talk back. If they’re not moving you forward, it’s not a failure — it’s feedback in the form of data points. Use that data to refine the process.

Evaluation of My 2025 Goals

These are goals I set in January of this year. I’ll give you an evaluation of how it’s going below. I will also show how I can tweak the goals to make them more attainable if they are lagging behind. Alternatively, I may decide to remove a goal altogether.

Here are the categories of my goals.

Reduce Mental Stress
  • Simplify meal prep planning — Create monthly menus. Evaluation: This one progressed through February and now it’s no longer important to continue this year. I took on too many goals and this one will remain on the list for the future!
  • Boundaries on phone and distractions. Evaluation: This one has been hit and miss which tells me I need to define it more. I can make this one more robust by using an “if-then” strategy. If it’s 8:00 pm, my phone is put away until the next morning.
Physical
  • Continue 4 days/week workouts. Evaluation: This one has been a success. I attribute the success because I decided early on that my workout days are Friday, Saturday, Sunday, and Monday. The time I workout on those days are between 5:00 and 6:00 pm. This is part of my routine and it’s a habit. (Hint: Success of this goal is due to implementation intentions)
  • Add 5th day of cardio (interval running). Evaluation: Due to shin splints, I have not been able to run. I’ve shifted to include additional interval cardio after weight training. I usually watch a fun or interesting YouTube video while I’m getting my cardio in. This is an example of Habit Stacking.
Spiritual
  • Attend Silent Retreat in April. Evaluation: This one has been completed.
  • Begin Bible Recap. Evaluation: This one is going well. I have begun reading through the Bible using the Bible Recap. I have consistently been reading for 100 days. (Hint: the success of this goal is due to breaking it down to mini-goals or a daily reading plan)
Social
  • Attend 1 Girls House Church event every other month. Evaluation: This one is going well.
Marriage
  • Monthly date night experiences. Evaluation: My hubby purchased a set of scratch off date cards. These cards tell you what to do for a date night. We followed through with this through March. This goal needs more definition using implementation intentions. If it’s the third Saturday of the month, we will go on a date night experience.
Professional
  • 1 blog post every Friday. Evaluation: Success! Posting a blog post every Friday!
  • 1 article submission to Tish Co News each month. Evaluation: I’ve submitted 5 articles so far and will turn in another article this week. Turning in articles monthly has built accountability. This habit has helped me write not only for Tish Co News, but also my blog. *Ahem* this is habit stacking!

Looking at this list, I know I won’t hit every target perfectly. And that’s not the point.

The point is to design goals that fit real life. To stretch, but not snap. To evolve, not obsess.

So if you’re halfway through the year and wondering if it’s too late to get back on track — it’s not.

You don’t need more motivation. You just need better methods and a strategy!

Here’s to a second half that’s more intentional, more grounded, and more aligned with who you’re becoming.

If you’re looking for someone to help you with your goals. Help you create implementation intentions, habit stack, define stretch goal, and/or hold accountability for those goals. I’m here for that! That’s what a coach does, after all. Use the submission form below and let’s get after those goals!

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12 Reasons to Keep a Journal

12 Reasons to Keep a Journal

I was just in my prayer journal and reading through the last few entries. One paragraph in an entry expresses how I feel like I’m wandering through the wilderness. It’s much like what the Israelites did, (Deuteronomy 29:5-6). I feel like I’m wandering because where I work full-time is restructuring the entire company, which includes headcount reductions (layoffs). I wrote about one of the ways I’m navigating this uncertainty last week. I’m in the middle of the unknown and living in an in-between place. The ways I’m choosing to battle through this is reminding myself of what is true. Did you know that truth telling = confession? To confess is to tell the truth, which is exactly what Perspective Confessions is all about. Below is a list of reminders I wrote in my prayer journal. It includes tidbits from journal entries from the months and weeks leading up to the restructure.

12 Journal Confessions of What is True

  • Give the feelings of uncertainty, fear, numbness, and disconnection to God
  • Stop running away from hard feelings. Journal to process the feelings and/or talk with a trusted friend or therapist.
  • Surrender to Him. I am not in control. God is in control. Have faith and trust in Him. Mark 9:24
  • Inviting Jesus into this weird place with me when I can’t seem to surrender it just yet
  • Praying a simple prayer asking Him to “lead the way”.
  • Jesus is Lord – John 13:13
  • God is unchanging – Isaiah 40:8
  • God loves me – 1 John 4:16
  • I’ve been found worthy without works. I don’t have to prove myself through work.- Galatians 2:16
  • My identity is not my work or my job title, it’s Jesus Christ – Galatians 3:26
  • Move forward one step at a time
  • Focus on Him – 1 Chronicles 16:11

12 Reasons to Keep a Journal

If you don’t already, I recommend keeping a journal. I don’t write in my journal every day. I don’t even write in it every week. However, it has been a practice in my life over the years. And, it has proven to be a powerful tool.

  1. It allows the processing of thoughts and feelings.
  2. It provides the opportunity to go back and read through experiences at different points in time.
  3. It’s a tool that helps you reflect on your mindset during past hardships.
  4. It helps you remember how things turned out.
  5. Reflection is a powerful tool. Hindsight is 20/20 after all.
  6. Journaling is a map that tells you where you’ve been and how far you’ve come. It helps you hold yourself accountable for how you got to where you are. It also helps you decide what you’d do differently, if anything.
  7. Reviewing the words you wrote during a hardship will remind you later of your strength.
  8. Articulating in written words helps your brain think more clearly.
  9. It gives swirling thoughts a home.
  10. It helps make clear what is unclear.
  11. It helps you navigate challenges.
  12. Keeping a journal slows you down. The world is so loud, busy, and fast. It’s easy to lose yourself in it all. One day you look up and don’t remember how you got where you are. If we aren’t careful, life passes us by without our permission.

Your Turn! Journal Prompt

A journal is a great way to check in with yourself periodically. Put 10 minutes on the timer on your phone. Spend those 10 minutes answering the questions below.

  • What is the biggest challenge you’re facing right now?
  • How would you like for it to turn out?
  • What can you do about it?
  • What is the right next step?

If you are looking for another resource that will simultaneously help you pray, journal, and listen for God’s voice; I highly recommend the book, Living Fearless by Jamie Winship.

*Another article coming soon about Leadership and Journaling.*

How to Pray While Navigating Uncertainty

How to Pray While Navigating Uncertainty

Stress and Uncertainty

This past week has been a difficult one. The company that I work for full-time is going through a re-structure. This isn’t the first one I’ve experienced, rather I’ve experienced many. You can read more about that in this post here. Company restructures are never easy and this one feels more stressful than those of the past. I empathize with anyone that has faced something like this. When faced with uncertainty, it calls upon your resilience muscles to be strong and exercised more.

*Making a note to myself now for a future resiliency post. Coming soon!*

Prayer is Absolutely a Strategy

During the restructure in 2020, I wrote a prayer as I was navigating through it. It has been a powerful prayer that I’ve come back to time and time again. I have it written in my notes app on my phone so I have it with me always.

I have found myself this past week reading through past prayer journal entries to remind myself of whose I am. I’ve needed the reminders that work does not define who I am. My job title does not. The company I work for does not. Rather, Jesus, has already found me worthy by dying for me on the cross. That is my worth and value. He is where my worth and value are. And I pray that you know that you have that same worth and value in Jesus too. He loves you. He cares for you. Just as He loves and cares for each of us. Even me. And I’ve needed that reminder this week. Romans 8:35 and Romans 8:38-39. Nothing can separate us from His love.

Let Us Pray Together

Here’s the prayer I wrote back in 2020. Please borrow it as you need. Use it if you are struggling to find the words to talk to our Heavenly Father.

Heavenly Father,

How easy it is to be thrown off track, to become uncentered. The world feels unstable. Instead of clinging to you, I run away. I hide and busy myself to ignore it all. I know you are the King of Kings, the creator of all. You are more powerful and mighty than any trouble, any stress, any worry. The enemy loves to play his games with my emotions, my doubts, my fears, my vulnerabilities. Jesus, I invite you in this moment with me. I need you. Fill me with your peace and joy. Ground me in your truth. Quiet my mind. Make still my nerves. Help me remember whose I am. Help me remember that you and you alone have control no matter the level of choas. Lord Jesus, in your name, I cast away the worry and fear. In your name, Father, I cast aside the anxiety. Fear does not come from you. Love comes from you! I need you always in my life. I am open to your love, your peace, your spirit. Lord Jesus, in your name this day will not be overwhelming, it will be successful, it will be okay. This day cannot overtake me, and it cannot overwhelm me. This day does not have that power, control, or authority over me. This day does not have permission to be these things. Father, you are with me. You created this day, and I will rejoice in it. I am grounded in you. I am grounded in your truth. Regardless of the Goliath in this day or in this season of my life…even if I only have a slingshot and a rock, ALL things are possible with you. Truth always stands. Hope is not silent. I am the daughter of the King. My worth and value is found in you. You hold my worth and value. Help me to stand grounded in that. Grant me the courage to stand firm and not waver. You created me and blessed me with talents and gifts that have a purpose. You have a bigger plan, a greater picture than this small piece that I can see in front of me. Help me rest in you, in your love. Lift my eyes to see you in the midst of the storm. Quiet my mind and fill me with your peace and joy. Holy Spirit, I pray that you come.

Amen.

Prayer by Carlynn Rainey-Crawford

What is Coaching?

What is Coaching?

Think of a coach you’ve had in your life or maybe your kids’ life. What did they do that was so effective? Coaches do many things, like:

  • Encourage
  • Teach techniques
  • Improve Performance
  • Identify gaps in performance
  • Challenge
  • Inspire
  • Hold you Accountable
  • Create a plan (or playbook) to reach your goals
  • Build trust
  • Unlock the next level

What else would you add to this list?

I am not a sports type of coach, although coaching for me started in the fitness industry. Read more about that here. While coaching began for me in fitness, it has evolved into Financial Coaching, Career Coaching, Leadership Coaching, and coaching on Personal Wellness. Most people would attribute the bulleted list above to a sports coach…these descriptors also describe what I do in coaching clients about their finances, careers, leadership, and personal wellness.

This type of coaching is a one-on-one conversation with a purpose. I don’t use equipment outside on a field in my coaching. Although I do have different sets of tools and resources to help you achieve your goals. I teach you what the tools are and how to apply them.

Financial, Career, Leadership, and Personal Wellness coaching focuses on the individual. I coach the whole person. What does that mean? It means that I aim to not only help find solutions to problems, but to facilitate transformational change. Focusing only on finding solutions would limit the depth of change for clients. Humans are complex beings made up of emotions, values, systems of beliefs, etc. These parts must be considered in the foundation of how we make decisions and take action. Otherwise, real change may be limited.

How does it work? If you decided you wanted to be coached, we would first meet to discuss your goals. Then, we would get very specific on what that goal is, and determine how we would measure progress. From there, we would map out a plan to get you to your goal. This plan would let us know how many coaching sessions would be needed.

As Your Coach, You Can Expect…

My job as a coach is to identify gaps and equip you with tools and resources. Educate you on how to apply the tools and resources. I ask you powerful questions to unlock self-discovery and insight. I hold you accountable and shift your mindset. I listen and build trust with you. I walk alongside you and give you feedback on what’s working well and what isn’t. I inject hope, encourage you, and challenge you. I inspire you to get out of your comfort zone and achieve your goals!

Expectations of the Client…

Your job as the client is to:

  • come to the coaching session prepared to discuss progress and challenges
  • apply the resources and tools
  • be open to transformational change and the work to get there
  • be open to experimenting with new strategies
  • put in the hard work
  • be committed to your goals
  • persistent in achieving your goals

Are you ready to get after your goals? Fill out the form below and let me know how I can best coach you. Let’s go!

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Battling the Hard Parts of Life with Therapy

Battling the Hard Parts of Life with Therapy

May – Mental Health Awareness Month

May is Mental Health Awareness month, and I would like to share my journey with therapy with you. You might recall the Career Confessions series I wrote recently. Part of the “confession” was my struggle with anxiety. Early on, it interfered with my work and job search. 

Why Therapy?

The journey with therapy, however, started for me in college. A visit here and there to the on-campus therapist was grounding. At the time, my mom had cancer and being away from home for this first time was hard. I had tough life questions. The therapist on campus helped me zoom out and then zoom in to the questions. This process allowed me to have a more balanced thought process. How many times are we so focused on a question or situation? We can’t zoom out from it to gain a better perspective. For me, it’s often. 😊 A therapist can help with that! 

Therapy Journey

A large part to my therapy journey is about my mom. She was sick much of my childhood. I was one of her caretakers while growing up. I was a primary caretaker from the ages of 15 – 18 (until I went off to college). I grew up fast! I was nominated as “Most Dependable” my senior year of high school. While it was an honor to receive that nomination, I earned it in my private home life. I learned the ultimate dependability by being my mom’s caretaker. 

There are a lot of positives that come from learning responsibility at a young age. However, it can also be very confusing. Caretaking an adult is hard for an adult let alone a child doing so. At the age of 25, my mom passed away. She was 55. I don’t think anyone is prepared to lose a parent. Losing my mom unearthed some “life stuff” I needed to address. I sought out therapy to talk through my mom’s death. There was a lot of processing I needed to do. Sometimes we are so close to a situation that we can’t see the full picture. A therapist can help with that. 

Therapy = Advocacy

I have learned through therapy that my mother’s sickness shaped me, both good and bad. The good is easier to hold some days than the bad. It’s easy to become fixated on one or the other. The point of therapy is to help you hold or see all aspects about yourself. At first, if you struggle with doing this, your therapist is there to help you until you are able to do it on your own. This is where advocacy comes into play and why it means so much at my core. My therapist has been my advocate in so many ways. Giving words to situations when I had none. She gave me a voice when I didn’t have one. And she has been there to hold my hand in all the hard things that I’ve been through. I can honestly say I would not be here right now if it weren’t for the gift of therapy. It has been life-changing. I have learned life-changing skills in therapy from navigating difficult relationships, to work challenges, to having compassion for myself. And having compassion for yourself is key to having compassion for others. Looking in the mirror, in my opinion, can be the biggest adversary you face. I know it has been for me. I can certainly stand in my own way. Therapy can help you get out of your own way! 

Life is Short

Therapy is hard, not going to lie. I don’t always like my therapist. She pushes me to look at the hard parts of life. She encourages me to talk about and process them too. Therapy has given me centeredness, truth, and grounding that is priceless. Maybe I would have gotten to this place on my own. Even if I had, it would have taken me so much longer. And don’t we deserve to get to a better place in life as fast as we can? Life is a vapor, James 4:14.  

Work on Yourself…for You and Others

A wise friend told me once, “Our work on ourselves is a lifetime and one day.” This means we are always inching toward being better versions of ourselves. Another quote that resonated with me: “The more we can understand our own thoughts, feelings, and emotions, the more we can understand someone else’s.” This is so true! The better you can see yourself, the better you can see others. There’s certainly more I could write about, but I will pause here. I hope this helps you seek a therapist if you’ve been thinking about it. And if you’ve never thought about it, I hope this helps you see a different side to therapy. I think we could all use a good therapist in our lives. Life is hard enough, and we deserve to be better people, for ourselves and each other. 

Perspective Confessions

Discovering grounded truths in an uprooted world

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