Tag: tips

An Overlooked Tool for Leaders

An Overlooked Tool for Leaders

Are you a leader of people?

Are you an influential leader? Influential doesn’t always mean you have direct reports. It means you collaborate with and guide others toward outcomes, often without formal authority. This ability to influence is essential for moving initiatives forward and being successful in your role.

Hint: we are all influential leaders!

This applies in the workplace, in your community, and at home. For example, parents—especially of teenagers—quickly learn that influence is far more powerful than control. The same principle applies to managers, project leads, and peers working across departments.

Too often we think leadership means being “the one in charge” with a team reporting to you. In reality, the most effective leaders know that influence, not control, is what drives collaboration, innovation, and long-term results.

One area all leaders have in common is working with people. Whether it’s direct reports or those you’re influencing to move initiatives and projects forward, managing and influencing people is a complex skill set—one you learn and refine over time.

Leaders are not mind readers. People are many shades of gray, shaped by their unique experiences, perspectives, and stories.

Every individual sees the world through their own lens, influenced by both their career and personal life. Effective leaders embrace this complexity and work to understand, adapt, and connect.

Leadership can also reach frustration and overwhelm quickly.

With constant technological change, leaders are stretched thin—running from meeting to meeting while processing an overwhelming amount of information.

The human mind was not designed to handle this relentless pace with clarity.

In such a fast-paced world, we’ve lost the art of slowing down. Reflection has become a forgotten tool.

Slowing down can feel archaic when demands push us to go faster and faster.

But the question remains: What are we missing by moving so fast? How would you even know what’s slipping past you when life is lived at lightning speed?

One underutilized tool for leaders is keeping a journal. Not typing notes into a phone or laptop—but physically writing in a journal with a physical pen and paper.

The physical act of writing slows down the mind automatically.

It creates space for reflection, and helps leaders process their experiences, challenges, and decisions in a deeper way.

It allows leaders to know and understand their unique perspectives. Which in turn will enhance their decision making every day.

A leader’s unique perspective is the source of creativity and competitive advantage.

In today’s AI world, tapping into creativity and having a competitive advantage is paramount.

Without slowing down and using journaling as a tool, we lose the art of listening to ourselves and our innate wisdom.

How do you create a discipline of journaling?

  1. Don’t over complicate it!
  2. Buy a journal.
  3. Set aside 15 minutes of uninterrupted time either at the beginning or end of your day to journal.
  4. Block that time on your calendar!
  5. Close your computer.
  6. Silence your notifications on your phone.
  7. Set a timer for 15 minutes.
  8. Write.

“Ok, great”, you might say. “But, what in the world do I write about? Especially when this feels like a weird, new thing to do?”

Great question!

Journal Prompts for Leaders.

Pick one to get started. What you journal about could either be personal or professional.

  1. What has been at the forefront of my mind today?
  2. What is keeping me up at night?
  3. What has been a common theme this week/last week?
  4. What are my priorities? Do those priorities stack up against the work I’m doing and meetings I’m attending?
  5. What needs to change?
  6. What am I missing?
  7. What is a circular thought pattern I’m having that I can’t find a solution?

Bonus Tips:

  1. Let yourself write whatever comes to mind.
  2. Do not have an agenda.
  3. No judgements in what you write about or don’t write about.
  4. Let the writing flow.
  5. Don’t be surprised if you start writing about one topic and you finish on another topic.
  6. Trust the process.
  7. Trust that whatever you write down is exactly what needed to be written and reflected upon.
  8. You just might surprise yourself.

Asking ourselves questions and slowing down to reflect brings us back to what is meaningful, what we believe in, and overall gives us purpose.

And if leaders reconnect to their purpose, that purpose will flow through them to those they influence. <– this is motivating and inspiring! It will have a ripple effect on your team and those you work alongside.

And all of this is a great ROI!

Challenge: Commit to journaling 15 minutes everyday for a month. Then, reflect on how it helped and enhanced your leadership.

In a world where we feel like we can’t slow down, it’s often exactly what leaders need.

For more reasons to journal, check this blog post: 12 Reasons to Keep a Journal

Career Confessions From a Small Town Girl in the Big City: Part 1

This article was originally published in Tishomingo County News. See link for published article.

Early in 2022, I visited my alma mater, Tishomingo County High School, to speak to the Career and College Readiness classes and to the football team. The football coach during that time had created a wonderful program to bring back alumni of Tishomingo County High School to speak to students, share their career journey, work skills, and life tidbits. It was called Wednesday #ROW Above the Line Character Education and Real Talk. It was an absolute honor to be invited to participate.

I had lots to share being a shy girl that moved to the big city. And let me tell you, I did not have a career trajectory when I moved to the big city. Nope, not at all. I wanted to share my story with students at Tish County. I wanted to share my messy path to the career I have now. If I’d had someone share with me back when I was in high school that life doesn’t always look the way you think it will, that it’s ok to make mistakes, to figure it out one step at a time; then maybe I wouldn’t have been so hard on myself. Spoiler alert, I wouldn’t change anything about my messy path because it got me to where I am now.

In fact, in 2006 I moved to Houston the day after graduating from Mississippi State University with an undergraduate degree in Finance. I was not recruited by a company in Houston and the real reason I moved so suddenly was because I was married to someone that had a job offer in Houston. I followed, obviously, however his success with a career did not measure up to the opportunities I had. Nope, in fact, I STRUGGLED mightily to find my way, or to even find a job. I stopped counting the job applications after I surpassed 100. No calls, no emails…crickets. I knew no one, had no contacts, nothing. I think a lot of people might find themselves in a similar place. You have a college degree or experience and yet no job offer, not real leads, nada.

So what did I do? I started with what I could find…a temp job which was a receptionist in downtown Houston in one of those gigantic skyscrapers. I remember it so vividly and don’t even know how I had the gumption and fortitude to ride a metro bus into downtown, walk to the right building, and then find my way to the appropriate floor. I remember my job was to answer the phone and connect the calls to the right people. The calls that came in were from people that had foreign accents, asking for people that I didn’t know how to pronounce their names. I asked the people on the phone to repeat themselves quite often and prayed as I connected the calls. I began to sweat at the front desk from the pressure of the phone ringing. I survived, though, even if the temp job only lasted a couple of days. If I could go back and tell my younger self anything, it would be, “there’s no pressure with a temp job that’s only 2 days in length. Relax! You are doing great!”

I found another job shortly thereafter, this time working at a staffing agency. I worked closely with a girl named Courtney. We were about the same age, our birthdays were both in April, and she attended Ole Miss for about a year. Small world and I was so glad to find someone with a Mississippi connection. I made it about 2 weeks in that job. I didn’t get fired, I quit. Why would I do such a thing? I struggled so much after I moved. I began having what I now know were anxiety attacks. Not being able to breath, crying uncontrollably, unable to calm myself. It was horrible and I quit my job. I was incredibly embarrassed and my already fragile self esteem took a major hit. The worst of it all was I felt like I let down my new friend, Courtney. I couldn’t find the words to tell her what was going on and I left without an explanation. I still feel terrible about it to this day. I felt like something was wrong with me and like I was a failure which only pushed me further into the anxiety.

Context is everything and so is hindsight. Looking back and reflecting has helped me understand that the only way I was going to get through that horrible time was to walk through it as hard as it was and as much as I felt like I wasn’t going to make it. Putting one foot in front of the other and yes, sometimes taking two or three steps backward. I needed to give myself some time to adjust to the big life change of uprooting myself from everything I’d ever known. And yet I needed to work and make money. Life doesn’t stop and neither do the bills! They weren’t going to pay for themselves. What did I do next? Stay tuned and I’ll unfold the story as this is the first part in a career series from a small town girl in the big city.

Career Confessions from a Small Town Girl in the Big City: Introduction


In 2022, I wrote a series about my career journey for Tish County News. The series was inspired by an invitation. I was invited to speak to the Career and College Readiness classes and to the football team at my alma mater, Tishomingo County High School. The message I wanted to convey to those high school students wasn’t about my job and current life. It was about the journey that it had taken to get there. I was not and still do not have a high profile job or career. My life after high school took some ups and downs and winding roads. I wish someone could have given me the 30,000 foot view when I was in high school because I was experiencing it all at ground zero. It would have been helpful to have insights and perspectives along my journey after high school. The invitation to speak to high school students was a chance to fill in the gap I wish I’d had. Writing this series was another opportunity. I hope you will follow along for the next several weeks as the story unfolds. There will be tips and tidbits shared as I look back with the wisdom that only hindsight can bring. I’ll share what I would tell my younger self. Back then, I struggled with extreme anxiety. I had low self-esteem and low confidence. At times, I felt altogether lost. I walked through big life events like my mom’s passing, divorce, and multiple job changes. Now is a great time to subscribe if you haven’t done so yet. Don’t miss this series! It’s packed full of actionable insight no matter where you are along your career journey.

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