This article was originally published in Tish Co News.
What is a Silent Retreat?
In November 2024, I drove all the way to Higden, Arkansas for a silent retreat hosted by Awaken Silent Retreat. Silent retreat = no talking and silent rest. Practicing silence means turning off and putting away all distractions. This helps us to better hear from God and the prompting of the Holy Spirit. It’s a spiritual discipline. It’s also a practice of being with yourself and hearing your own thoughts and voice. It’s a practice of resting. I’ve been practicing silence and stillness for a few years, read about it here.
How to Know if You Are a Good Candidate for a Silent Retreat?
How often are you quiet during the day? How often do you truly rest? When you lay down at night, is this the first time that you are quiet with no distractions? Does your mind spring to life with thoughts and worries? Yep, mine too. This means I’m not allowing time in the day, to think, to pray, or to process. In fact, I often work hard to keep from having to think, process, or feel because it seems overwhelming. It takes a lot of energy to keep pushing things down or away. This might be why feeling tired and overwhelmed are commonplace these days. We aren’t allowing space to just be; to be a human being instead of a human doing. When I first heard about this silent retreat, it was on a podcast, Prosperity with Purpose. The podcaster, Jessica Hefley, had recently attended. They had many wonderful things to say about it, and I immediately wanted to experience it too. She described it as a way to eliminate distraction, crowds, and hurry which stands between us and peace. These are tools the enemy uses to keep us separated from God.
Jesus spoke to his disciples in Mark 6:31a. He said, “Come away with me by yourselves to a quiet place and get some rest.”
I didn’t know much about this retreat. However, I trusted Jessica Hefley’s review on her podcast, Silent Retreat to 10x Your Life. So, I sought it out, signed up, and prepared myself to drive 7 hours to attend. That’s a key indicator that I was craving peace and rest. The drive wasn’t difficult at all. Much of the travel was familiar to me. This is because we usually travel through Arkansas on our way home to Iuka, MS.
Silent Retreat Experience
Once I arrived, I was greeted by Danielle, who was leading us that weekend. It was going to be a small group, only 5 of us. After introductions, we ate dinner all while still talking and getting to know one another. Then, we gathered in the living room. Danielle led us in a few songs of worship. She prepared our minds with scripture and then we closed with prayer. We turned off our phones and turned them in for the weekend, and we shifted into silence. Each of us had our own bedrooms and I quickly retired to mine. I was tired from the day’s drive. My usual routine for bed is watching TV and being on my phone. I had neither and I slept 8 hours that night! When I awoke and emerged from my room, breakfast had already been made. I took my coffee outside on the deck and then proceeded down to the lake shore to explore. I noticed deer and dog prints in the mud and the small, smooth rocks along the shore. I sat on top of a big rock overlooking the lake. Fishermen in boats would wave as they passed by. There was an island directly across from shore and kayaks could be used to get there. One of the ladies from the retreat had struck out on an island adventure. She was braver than I. I wandered back up to the cabin. I really didn’t want to read a book while I was at the retreat. I wanted to be silent and hear from God. My mind was not cooperating. I remembered Danielle’s prompting that sometimes it’s better to focus your mind on a book. I pulled from the library the one she recommended, “Living Fearlessly” by Jamie Winship. The book was incredibly helpful with prayer prompts and encouragement for listening for God’s voice. The book recommended to pray and write down what you hear or sense from God. Looking up from the book, I found myself noticing the leaves drop from the trees. This is what I wrote in my journal:
“Methodical drops. Not one leaf in a hurry, making its decent gracefully with swoops and spins. Not to be rushed. The leaves fall joyfully. The season changing and the leaves don’t try to stay. When it’s their time to go, they let go and fall freely. Not a worry or bother. They are doing what they are supposed to do. No argument, only a delightful freefall to make a crunchy carpet on the ground.”
Later, my attention was brought to the squirrels. I wrote about them, too:
“Scampering squirrels. Jumping from one branch to another. They must weigh a few ounces because the branches barely move under their weight. Back and forth they scale at least 15 trees. Never a misstep. They are skilled tree climbers and jumpers. Never needing the ground to get to where they are going, instead they navigate tree city. Scampering to gather food for the day. Methodically searching for the day’s allotment. They don’t spin or toll. They know they will be provided for; their creator provides for them.”
That evening, I found another big rock to perch upon with a blanket and watched over the lake. I loved seeing all nature’s details. The vibrant green weeds against the stark contrast of the rust brown rocks, the dormant gray trees and grass. The white and yellow flowers on the weeds. I was still and silent with no distractions. Because of this, I noticed all the landscape colors. I slept for 9 hours that night. We remained silent until 10:00 am on Sunday for a total of 40 hours of silence. After we broke our silence, Danielle led us with worship songs and scripture. We each shared what our experience had been. God met each of us right where we needed Him…all in unique and different ways. For me, it was God bringing me into the present to notice the leaves, the squirrels, and the color palette along the shoreline. My mind is usually so distracted with worries that it’s hard to be present. All in all, it was an absolute wonderful experience and I already went back for another one this April! (I’ll write about that experience soon too!)
Silence is an Neglected Gift
Our world is filled with distractions. Unless we are intentional with who and what is gaining our attention, the distractions will win every time. The silent retreat was a way to encourage me to find pockets of time to be silent. To put away the phone, take a walk in nature, and be silent and still. Silence is rare and an often-neglected gift.
Coaching started for me when I became a fitness 💪 instructor in my late 20’s. I fell in love with fitness classes, and one of the fitness instructors I fangirled over encouraged me to get certified to teach 👩🏻🏫.
So, I did.
I LOVED ♥️ every minute of teaching, coaching, encouraging others to push past their limits, and achieve their goals 🎯. There’s something addicting about watching someone have a “light bulb💡 moment”. A moment they completed an exercise, lifted heavier weights, completed an entire class, lost the weight, got stronger, etc. All things they had told themselves they could not do.
And then…they did. I got to witness this over and over and it never got old!
Fast forward to the year 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣0️⃣, the start of the pandemic. I wasn’t instructing fitness classes anymore. Instead, I found myself working from home full time. As with many industries and corporations, 2020 was a challenging year. The oil and gas industry was no different and my corporation went through a major headcount reduction starting with executive level all the way down to hourly employees. So much was out of my control with the uncertainty of my job and with the virus. To help pass the time ⏰ and focus on something that was in my control, I completed Financial Coach Master Training, earned my certificate 📜, and became a Financial Coach.
Many may not know that I’m a nerd 🤓 when it comes to money 💵 . My undergrad degree from Mississippi State University is in Finance so you’d think that’s when the nerd came out, but it wasn’t. I’ve always been into saving money, even from my youth. It wasn’t odd for me to put on a jacket and find money in it. Money that someone gave me and I put in a pocket to save for later.
In my Junior year of college I read the Total Money Makeover by Dave Ramsey. After reading his book 📕, I would occasionally listen to his radio 📻 talk show. It made sense. I loved that there were baby steps and I could understand it. Now, mind you, I did not follow the baby steps to a “T”. When I graduated college, I had student loans, a credit card, and a car 🚘 note.
Fast forward through a lot of life and getting remarried in my mid 30’s. We found ourselves in debt. Between tax debt, car 🚘 loan, and student loans; we owed just shy of $30,000. We followed the baby steps and got out of debt within a year’s time. Now we continue to work to pay off our house early and are aggressively saving for retirement. With the 1️⃣1️⃣ year age difference between my husband and me, I hope to retire when he does. That cuts off about 10 years of retirement contributions and savings for me, so it’s hustle time! 👊🏼 #goals
In 2️⃣0️⃣2️⃣3️⃣, I became a Leadership Coach in my corporate oil and gas job. I work one-on-one with leaders with direct reports and influential leaders. Influential leaders are ones that may not have a team reporting to them, but they have many people that they must influence to deliver results and progress projects. In reality, we are all influential leaders in our jobs. During coaching sessions I help clients develop goals that we will work on together. During sessions, we talk through challenges, progress, tools 🛠️ , and potentially even new or refreshed goals. My role as a leadership coach is not to solve the problem for my clients, rather to ask ❓ the right questions , give feedback, reframe, and offer perspective that helps the client find their solution.
Anyone starting to see 👀 a theme here?
Coaching.
Regardless if it’s fitness 💪 coaching, leadership coaching, or financial 💵coaching similar skills apply. I’ve always had in inner coach within me. Especially if you’ve read my writings very much, you’ll see 👀 or read 📖 it. I’m frequently asking questions, encouraging improvement and progress, etc. What goals do you have? What are you willing to do differently to achieve them? Who is holding you accountable? What’s holding you back? What is your plan to achieve your goals?
Coaching is all about finding the answers to those questions, creating a plan to execute, and having accountability along the way.
Stay tuned, I’ll have an opening for financial coaching soon! Details to come!